I find it most ironic that the more I worry about my ageing mother, the more impatient and intolerant I am with her infirmities. It is as if I cannot accept her ageing. Every sign of forgetfulness, every little mistake she makes is greeted with an incredulous query, and sometimes, even an admonishment. I am not proud of myself when I am short with Mummy, but I am oftentimes unable to control my response.
At the heart of my less than sympathetic behaviour is fear. I dread the day she will leave me behind and return to God. She will leave an impossibly huge void and I will mourn inconsolably. There are, in fact, times I catch myself mourning the inevitable parting now. So every instance of age-related vulnerability strikes a chord of terror within me. I don't want her to go. Ever. How would I survive without her in my life?
Here is where faith, and hope, carry me in this love relationship. Because I believe in the Kingdom of Heaven, I know that, one day, I will be joined, not just with my Heavenly Father, but with every person I have ever loved, and we will all live together, united in eternal bliss and harmony.
In the meantime, I can stop being afraid, and try to be the most loving, caring, the best daughter I can be to my mother, storing up happy memories to tide me through the eventual chasm of death, until we rise again with Christ, in mystical union. I can await with eagerness the ultimate mother-daughter future in eternity, which will suffer a mere temporary parting of ways on earth.
Yesterday afternoon, some of the Woman to Woman Ministry ladies, past and present, got together to celebrate being women of hope. It was a time of fellowship, brief reflection, and rejoicing in God's goodness through song and dance. Although I had to leave early, I left inspired.
Like love, hope is not based on feelings, but it is an act of will. We can hope, even in our most despairing moments, and we can choose to bring light into the darkest periods of our lives, and to bear light to others who are with us in the darkness, and who have lost hope, even faith.
Hope, as a theological virtue, is a grace given by God, to encourage us and help us along the rocky path of life in making the right decisions to live a life of love, knowing, deep in our bones that what we will find, eventually, is unmatched happiness when we meet Him face to face, with no barriers in between as we have here on earth, and our hearts will beat as one accord. Centred in our identity as children of God, hope also helps us live fruitful lives.
The Catechism of the Catholic Church, paragraph 1818, says this:
The virtue of hope responds to the aspiration to happiness which God has placed in the heart of every man; it takes up the hopes that inspire men's activities and purifies them so as to order them to the Kingdom of heaven; it keeps man from discouragement; it sustains him during times of abandonment it opens up his heart in expectation of eternal beatitude. Buoyed up by hope, he is preserved from selfishness and led to the happiness that flows from charity.
Put simply, the virtue of hope points us towards happiness, by inspiring us to goodness and generosity; hope brings out the best in each of us and keeps us going even in the midst of difficulties. Hope purifies our intentions and motivations, so we can fearlessly walk the way of the Cross with eyes trained on Jesus. Hope is what gives us the vision to see beyond mortal tragedy and great loss, to know we are not alone, and that we can always rely on the goodness of God.
There are four capitol errors* pointed out by F.K. Bartels in his excellent exposition on hope. They are: unawareness of or disbelief in God's immanent presence; doubt of God's all inclusive plan of divine love; the apparent inability to trust in God's help; and the growing uncertainty that God intervenes in human history and in the daily lives of his children.
Knowing what we know about Jesus and having encountered His goodness personally does not stop us from doubt or despair, more so when crisis or calamity hits us. So it is necessary to note and remember when and where we have experienced His beneficence, to remain rooted in His unchanging and undying love for us, and to keep turning back to Him when we falter. Isn't that what Lent is all about anyway, turning back?
Bartels calls Saint Maximilian Kolbe a portrait of hope, a man who was given the supernatural gift of hope to trustingly walk forward even as he gave his life up for another in Auschwitz.
For the Christian, nothing in life is merely a fluke. Even the very worst of circumstances, such as the horrors found in the death camp of Auschwitz, can ultimately be the very path toward permanent, supernaturally infused bliss and the unending reception of divine love, provided we open our hearts in hope to God and make every effort to live according to his will.
Thinking back on the sudden death of J almost a year ago, I can say that grievous as his death was to me at the time, I entered into a new relationship of trust, and hope, with Jesus. The tragedy encouraged me to cling to the Father's promises, and to be unafraid of loving others. It helped nudge my nascent relationship with P to definitive heights.
To live according to God's will requires heroic amounts of hope, but it is precisely heroic amounts of hope that will be given us if we desire it, and we wish to walk the mile with no compromise. Try it. Give hope a chance and let it transform your life in ways you never imagined.
* http://www.catholic.org/news/saints/story.php?id=47246
At the heart of my less than sympathetic behaviour is fear. I dread the day she will leave me behind and return to God. She will leave an impossibly huge void and I will mourn inconsolably. There are, in fact, times I catch myself mourning the inevitable parting now. So every instance of age-related vulnerability strikes a chord of terror within me. I don't want her to go. Ever. How would I survive without her in my life?
Here is where faith, and hope, carry me in this love relationship. Because I believe in the Kingdom of Heaven, I know that, one day, I will be joined, not just with my Heavenly Father, but with every person I have ever loved, and we will all live together, united in eternal bliss and harmony.
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| Celebrating Mummy's 84th birthday |
In the meantime, I can stop being afraid, and try to be the most loving, caring, the best daughter I can be to my mother, storing up happy memories to tide me through the eventual chasm of death, until we rise again with Christ, in mystical union. I can await with eagerness the ultimate mother-daughter future in eternity, which will suffer a mere temporary parting of ways on earth.
Yesterday afternoon, some of the Woman to Woman Ministry ladies, past and present, got together to celebrate being women of hope. It was a time of fellowship, brief reflection, and rejoicing in God's goodness through song and dance. Although I had to leave early, I left inspired.
Like love, hope is not based on feelings, but it is an act of will. We can hope, even in our most despairing moments, and we can choose to bring light into the darkest periods of our lives, and to bear light to others who are with us in the darkness, and who have lost hope, even faith.
Hope, as a theological virtue, is a grace given by God, to encourage us and help us along the rocky path of life in making the right decisions to live a life of love, knowing, deep in our bones that what we will find, eventually, is unmatched happiness when we meet Him face to face, with no barriers in between as we have here on earth, and our hearts will beat as one accord. Centred in our identity as children of God, hope also helps us live fruitful lives.
The Catechism of the Catholic Church, paragraph 1818, says this:
The virtue of hope responds to the aspiration to happiness which God has placed in the heart of every man; it takes up the hopes that inspire men's activities and purifies them so as to order them to the Kingdom of heaven; it keeps man from discouragement; it sustains him during times of abandonment it opens up his heart in expectation of eternal beatitude. Buoyed up by hope, he is preserved from selfishness and led to the happiness that flows from charity.
Put simply, the virtue of hope points us towards happiness, by inspiring us to goodness and generosity; hope brings out the best in each of us and keeps us going even in the midst of difficulties. Hope purifies our intentions and motivations, so we can fearlessly walk the way of the Cross with eyes trained on Jesus. Hope is what gives us the vision to see beyond mortal tragedy and great loss, to know we are not alone, and that we can always rely on the goodness of God.
There are four capitol errors* pointed out by F.K. Bartels in his excellent exposition on hope. They are: unawareness of or disbelief in God's immanent presence; doubt of God's all inclusive plan of divine love; the apparent inability to trust in God's help; and the growing uncertainty that God intervenes in human history and in the daily lives of his children.
Knowing what we know about Jesus and having encountered His goodness personally does not stop us from doubt or despair, more so when crisis or calamity hits us. So it is necessary to note and remember when and where we have experienced His beneficence, to remain rooted in His unchanging and undying love for us, and to keep turning back to Him when we falter. Isn't that what Lent is all about anyway, turning back?
Bartels calls Saint Maximilian Kolbe a portrait of hope, a man who was given the supernatural gift of hope to trustingly walk forward even as he gave his life up for another in Auschwitz.
For the Christian, nothing in life is merely a fluke. Even the very worst of circumstances, such as the horrors found in the death camp of Auschwitz, can ultimately be the very path toward permanent, supernaturally infused bliss and the unending reception of divine love, provided we open our hearts in hope to God and make every effort to live according to his will.
Thinking back on the sudden death of J almost a year ago, I can say that grievous as his death was to me at the time, I entered into a new relationship of trust, and hope, with Jesus. The tragedy encouraged me to cling to the Father's promises, and to be unafraid of loving others. It helped nudge my nascent relationship with P to definitive heights.
To live according to God's will requires heroic amounts of hope, but it is precisely heroic amounts of hope that will be given us if we desire it, and we wish to walk the mile with no compromise. Try it. Give hope a chance and let it transform your life in ways you never imagined.
* http://www.catholic.org/news/saints/story.php?id=47246
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