Indestructible seed

Last weekend I watched a slew of romantic movies as Valentine's Day fell on Friday. Although I am not a fan of sad endings, the movie I really liked was Lootera, a movie loosely based on O. Henry's short story The Last Leaf.

It is a beautifully shot and acted (Sonakshi Sinha and Ranveer Singh are brilliant) romantic drama set in the 1950s and tells the story of an accidental, impossible love and its subsequent betrayal, to its ultimate redemption. Despite the sad ending, the tale moves from bitterness and despair into hope. Tragedy is transformed into triumph when Varun strains beyond his past in an unselfish act of love that costs him his life.

This is how the story goes. Boy meets girl. They fall in love but boy disappears, leaving girl standing at the altar. The double whammy is boy also cheated and stole from girl's father, leaving the family in reduced circumstances. Girl's father dies, a broken man, and girl is left alone, a sick, dying and embittered recluse. Their paths cross when boy is wounded running away from the police and seeks refuge in girl's bungalow.

Pakhi is still furious with Varun but does not turn him over to the police. It turns out that Varun did truly love Pakhi but ended up choosing his former life of crime because he felt he was unable to shake off his past to begin life anew.

Pakhi becomes very ill and is convinced that when the last tree sheds its last leaf in the wintry cold, she will die. Knowing this, Varun climbs the tree to tie a leaf he has fashioned onto a branch so that Pakhi will cling on to life. He does this repeatedly as he nurses her back to health over several days.

The police eventually suspect his whereabouts but instead of escaping, Varun stubbornly ties the last leaf one final morning, then slowly walks toward the waiting police and certain death. Pakhi awakes feeling better, and is left with the truth of Varun's actions.

What appeals to me in this love story is the conflicted courtship and the fractured relationship between Pakhi and Varun. Love is never an easy or straightforward course. There are no simplistic happily-ever-afters as it is usually portrayed in the movies.

Couples hurt each other. They make monumentally stupid choices. They destroy the very thing they seek at times. And there is no turning back the clock. And yet, there is this thing called redemption when love moves out of fear, hurt, despair, self-serving gratuity and social constricts into actions that sing of quiet sacrifice with no expectation of return. Pure, self-giving unconditional love.

The paradox of such sacrificial love is that it frees us to be who we are. In staying back, Varun made the most liberating decision of his life. Even though he will die for it, the price was paid willingly for it not only brought healing into Pakhi's life, but he finally became the man he wanted to be when he was with her - a better man.

In 1 Peter, chapter 1, verses 22-23, the saint writes:

By obedience to the truth you have purified yourselves for a genuine love of your brothers; therefore, love one another constantly from the heart. Your rebirth has come, not from a destructible but from an indestructible seed, through the living and enduring word of God. 

When love comes from the heart, it mirrors the love God has for us and therefore acquires a hint of transcendent immortality, enduring through time like a great masterpiece.

In O. Henry's short story, the last leaf is painted by an elderly artist to give hope to his young neighbour who is ill and convinced she will die when the last leaf falls. She recovers for she does not give up (as the last leaf does not fall), but he falls sick and dies after painting the last leaf on the wall, catching pneumonia himself. The artist who did not acquire any success in his lifetime, painted something priceless for he inspired hope and life.

My life may not be as dramatic as the movies or novels, but I can strive to love as genuinely as Varun and the artist Behrman did. And when I am dispirited or feel that my efforts are futile, my hope lies in the wisdom and love of my living God who is indestructible.

Of mice and monkeys

Last weekend I was invited to TR's home for steamboat and it was great CNY fun. MP upped the conviviality factor by doubling up as the lohei mui (the lass who preps the yusheng salad for all), expertly reading from her Blackberry, and the jiu mei (alcohol maid) dispensing the wine freely.

TR put on a spread of the freshest seafood, vegetables and condiments to satisfy even the pickiest palate. The dessert spread included fruit, ice cream and a gorgeous red velvet cake baked by M.

Apart from the excellent eats, TR provided the entertainment as well. Conversant with the Chinese zodiac, she answered questions on the different animals and their traits, going round the dinner table.

As TR touched on the character strengths and flaws of each animal and its compatibility with other animals, the common thread we each found was that most of our families are composed of animals who purportedly do not get along.

I smiled inwardly at the wisdom of God. For where else do we learn to be human? Unfortunately, most of us tend to avoid the difficult relationships in our families, and years of baggage make reconciliation all that much harder.

We even find it impossible, to honour the spirit of the reunion dinner and subsequent CNY meals, where everyone sits at one table to "eat rice" companionably and joyously as one family.

When I reflect on the many traditions of the CNY festivities, it is not just about good fortune, prosperity, health, success and abundance in the new year. The Chinese New Year is also a time for gathering, renewing bonds, demonstrating filial piety, and of getting rid of the old and putting on the new - not just the material, but one's aspirations and desires.

It is about harmony, centred mainly on family harmony. It is about respecting your elders, getting along with your siblings and doting on your children. This harmony also extends to the wider circle of friends and acquaintances. Red packets with money are dispensed not just to children and singles, but to thank those who serve you in the year, wishing them well. (This includes and is not restricted to the garbage collectors and the road sweepers.)

Getting back to the dinner conversation, TR shared that her parents took pains to ensure she would not grow into the less desirable characteristics of her zodiac animal. Her parents did what good parents do; mould their children's characters so that they become adults who are giving, respectful, hardworking and humble. TR is all that, so her parents did good. Love you, TR, for all that you are.

As the CNY celebrations finally draw to a close, I give thanks for my family, the whole menagerie, who keep me grounded, and I thank TR for giving me new insight into my relations so that I can understand them a little better, liking and loving them a little more. 

Becoming women of joy

Last Saturday afternoon, the Woman to Woman Ministry organized a talk by Maria Vadia who had been invited by the Archdiocese of Singapore’s Office for Young People, in partnership with ICPE Mission Singapore, to teach at the School of Witness, a nine-week faith formation programme for Catholic youth leaders.

 

The event was such a success in terms of attendee numbers that I asked S, someone I knew, what attracted her to the event? She replied the word joy (the theme had been Becoming Women of Joy).

 

I am not surprised. And yet, at the same time, we should already know how to be joyous. We should be, as Maria put it, be happy Catholics, for joy is our inheritance.

 

It does not mean that we will not experience pain, loss or suffering, but if we are rooted in the reality of Christ's salvific love, then we should experience a deep, abiding joy even in the midst of protracted trials.

 

Maria offered a simple yet winning approach to becoming women of joy (men, this is for you, too) found in 1 Thessalonians 5:18: Give thanks in everything.

 

We should constantly be singing songs of praise and thanksgiving. Even when things seem to go wrong, instead of whining about it, or giving vent to anger and frustration in a negative, destructive way, we should thank God for the situation.

 

She reminded us that: Death and life are in the power of the tongue. Whoever values it shall eat from its fruits from Proverbs 18:21, so we must be careful how we use our tongues. Our words have a spiritual effect therefore strive to always speak words that are life-giving, and do not grieve the Spirit.

 

Maria shared stories of miracles that happened to people she had prayed with, and who then commenced to move in thanksgiving, as she directed:

 

A journalist jailed for writing a story deemed inappropriate was set free inexplicably, much to the joy of his wife who had stopped praying for her husband’s freedom and instead began to give thanks. 

 

A man who chose to attend a seminar Maria was leading despite worrying about his crop was informed that rain had ended the dry spell and his livelihood was protected. At the seminar he had learned to praise God. 

 

A failing paint shop suddenly saw three customers in a day who bought enough paint to pay the rent for that month, and thereafter business continued to pick up. This happened when the owners changed the way they prayed.

 

These "success stories" came about because the parties involved began to emulate Jesus, doing as He did, which brought Lazarus back to life: Then, lifting his eyes, Jesus said: Father, I give thanks to you because you have heard me. John 11:41

 

If we want to be full of joy, Maria emphasized, we must change the way we speak and see life. We must change the way we pray. Give thanks and praise for answered prayer, even before we see the results.

 

Thank the Lord for what He has in store for us. As He tells us in Jeremiah chapter 29, verse 11: "For I know the plans I have for you," declares the LORD, "plans to prosper you and not harm you, plans to give you hope and a future."
 

Life may not always be predictable, but if we believe this promise made to Jeremiah, then we will open our mouths and let our tongues move in praise and thanksgiving. We will rejoice always, and thus become women of joy, as Mary and Elizabeth were. 

Revelation and mission

When I think of evangelization, it gives me sweaty palms.  I have never been any good at selling anything. I am not glib of tongue and I cannot think on my feet. Worse, I am also a squeamish cradle Catholic who is reticent about sharing the Gospel. Quite un-missionary-like.

So what Saint Paul, a fiery evangelist, said to the Corinthians (first letter, chapter 2, verses 1-5) is encouraging for he professes to weakness, fear and trembling and admits that he has no persuasive words of wisdom, only words that are a demonstration of the Spirit and power.

Yesterday, Maria Vadia echoed Paul's words as she spoke to those who attended her afternoon sharing at the Church of Saint Francis Xavier.

She first stressed that evangelization is not a programme but a lifestyle. Therefore we must repent, that is make a change in how we live, and step out of our comfort zone. This change involves loving people enough to want to share the Good News.

Loving people is the kicker. How do I love those who are difficult to love? People who are mean, negative and openly hostile, derisive of my every overture. Two words: Holy Spirit.

If, in the desire to bring people to Jesus, I listen closely to the promptings of the Holy Spirit and I am faithful in carrying them out, then I will be able to carry out the mission of evangelization. A mission woven into the spiritual DNA of every Christian, Catholics included.

It is not about having the right skills or qualifications, what Saint Paul calls oratory or philosophy, but the right attitude. If I am docile to the Holy Spirit who lives within me, then I will be given the key to open a person's heart towards receiving Christ.

The revelatory Spirit will guide me, enabling me to breach the unloveable and unwelcome façade to see, and love, the person within.

Maria shared the story of Christine, a woman who shunned all efforts to reach out to her. Christine lived in Genesis House, a home for the homeless with AIDS. She was surly and uncommunicative, and turned her nose up at the food Maria brought on her regular visits.

At her wits' end, Maria implored, God, help me! She received a vision: a MacDonald's double cheeseburger with a large order of fries. When she offered this to Christine, she saw the first smile she had ever seen on Christine's face and consequently, this food offering was the opening Maria had sought hard to share Jesus with Christine and bring her to Christ.

Evangelization is about giving others what we already have. We must therefore have the heart of God, something we can find only in and through Jesus. Hence an intimate, living relationship with Jesus is necessary. And through this relationship, we get acquainted with the Holy Spirit, who allows the power of God to be manifested.

Maria calls the gift of tongues, our personal love language with God. It helps us connect to God in a visceral and mystical way that bypasses our intellect for it is a heart language. In using our heart language, we can become powerful conduits of grace, bringing divine 
insights and supernatural healing to others for we allow the Holy Spirit to do His thing, work His magic.

She encouraged us to claim the gifts of the Spirit, especially that of tongues. When we exercise our spiritual gifts, we co-partner the Holy Spirit so that everywhere we go, opportunities by divine appointment (much like how Philip met the Ethiopian eunuch in the wilderness) abound. We become gifted people (read 1 Corinthians chapter 12), inside and out, personifying love in action.

Maria demonstrated the power of the Holy Spirit by doing what she exhorted us to do and it was amazing to see the many healings and the number of people who received the baptism of the Holy Spirit and the gift of tongues.

Yesterday, I went with an open heart to receive, and I did. I was reminded of how much I was loved, and my prayer on how I was supposed to share the Good News was answered.

Stop thinking or analyzing so much. Stop feeling unworthy, not up to task, for I will never be up to the task. Just say yes and move in the Spirit (that means pray unceasingly), and God will do the rest.

I need only to listen well to receive His revelations and then act on them to carry out God's mission of love to all, as Jesus did.