Monday, January 10, 2011

Friends forever

One of the best gifts in life is someone whom you thought was a social kind of friend but turns out to be someone you can count on when the going gets rough. A was such a friend.

It was 1987 when I had just returned from my studies abroad and found it hard to fit back into life at home. My escape was jazz class and that's where we met.

She was an older woman but full of verve and energy, not afraid of looking silly in class. We clicked for A was ultra-friendly, funny and had a gift of being honest to the point of rudeness that absolutely had me in stitches.

It also amused me no end how she tut-tutted my job-hopping ways (she worked for one employer her entire life) and decried my single state of life (which she tried numerous times to remedy with her rather disastrous match-making efforts).

Besides shared laughter and interests, what makes a friendship one that lasts until death intervenes?

In this instance it was the outstretched hand, offered voluntarily out of love with no thought of reward or compensation, that wove a flexible, enduring bond that began life on a tenuous thread of common interest.

A was a casual friend and my modern dance buddy. We met occasionally, some years more than others, some less, and we enjoyed each other's company when we met. That was the relationship we had, light and easy.

Until she saw an opportunity to help me in a period where I was struggling and she reached out in love, and with great perspicacity and generosity

That was the tipping point of our relationship. I loved her for that singular act of love that transformed my life.

A and I used to dance to this song by Michael W. Smith and it says exactly how I feel, especially the chorus:

And friends are friends forever
If the Lord's the Lord of them
And a friend will not say never

'Cos the welcome will not end
'Though it's hard to let you go
In the Father's hands we know
That a lifetime's not too long
To live as friends.

Thank you A for enriching my life in so many ways. When I grow up I want to be just like you, especially the candour that was so endearing. Right now, people just find me rude.

Rouse up heaven with your inimitable flair, tell God how to run heaven and say hi to G for me. Miss you.

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