Conversion stories

A couple of weeks ago, B. rang me and told me she had bumped into my cousin G. and they ended up sharing their conversion stories with each other over dinner. I never cease to marvel at how lives are transformed diametrically when we each meet and connect with the One who brings us the calibre of happiness we look for all our lives and never quite find in things human-made.

Raniero Cantalamessa uses the parable Jesus told of the hidden treasure to describe conversion: "The kingdom of heaven is like a treasure hidden in a field; a man finds it and hides it again, then he goes, full of joy, and sells all he has and buys the field."

It is only when the man finds the treasure that he now has “the strength and the joy to sell all” and this conversion, Fr. Cantalamessa goes on to say, “is the way to happiness and a full life. It is not something painful, but the greatest joy. It is the discovery of the hidden treasure and the pearl of great price.”

Having experienced it myself, I concur with what he says for only such transcendent joy can effect and sustain the necessary process of selling all, which takes time (a whole lifetime, in fact, for conversion is not a one-shot deal but a lifelong process).

While conversion isn’t something painful per se, it does involve pain: the pain of letting go, giving up, dying to self, leaving behind the vestiges of one’s former way of life. Tis not easy… but I would not change a step I’ve travelled on the narrow path. Nor do I wish to switch paths or walk back even when temptation allures so charmingly from time to time.

For it was only when I said goodbye to the final enduring bits of my “worldly” life two years ago that I found the freedom to move light years ahead and find my identity, my worth and my purpose, and consequently, the sense of security and well-being a child finds in her mother’s loving arms.

Like the woman with the alabaster flask in Matthew’s gospel, knowing that my many sins are forgiven has enabled me to be (and feel) loved wholly, and to love wholeheartedly in return.

In a world where people search so desperately for love, they need only look inward into the eyes of the Father to find the hidden treasure.