We come out of our mother's womb struggling. Both mother and child will experience a mix of pain and fear, amidst the awe and joy. Every new thing we learn as a child, be it walking or talking, involves great effort, and most certainly, initial failure. So why is it that, as adults, we expect life to be plain sailing, or we shy away from struggles?
When life pulls the rug from underneath our feet, we moan and wail, ready to give up and walk away? How did we lose the innate confidence we had as children that we were born to walk, and thus, we never stop attempting to stand up again and walk, even after we have fallen the gadzillionth time. We are bold, intrepid beings, undeterred by failure. Adversity is swatted away by chubby fingers and blithe spirits.
Having hit an emotional speed bump lately I have been reflecting on where I am right now - why am I struggling so much, and what is it that I am being put through my paces to learn? P mentioned last Friday evening that emotional crises are brought upon by transitions in life. I guess that must be it. I am currently still transitioning into married life.
Don't get me wrong, I can see practically almost every blessing I receive in this new season of life, and I am filled with gratitude and joy. But, to be honest, there are things I mourn deeply and I grapple with change (why can't certain things stay the way they were). I suffer a sense of guilt for having left certain things, certain people, behind. I keep telling myself not to look back, lest I become like Lot's wife, paralyzed and unable to move forward in my new life.
Then there are the growing pains, and the need to find balance and inner harmony when thrown into a completely new arena fraught with complexities to negotiate. I am impatient to get on with it and acquire a certain level of expertise that can only come with time. Instead, I wish to fast forward life and skip the struggles, knowing full well that going through it all is necessary in order for insight and wisdom to come.
When Father Romeo said change was a blessing in our lives during his weekend homily, I almost groaned. I don't dispute that change can be wonderful, but I take issue with how it can be strange-awkward painful, causing me to struggle before a new equilibrium is found.
In order to fly, the butterfly must struggle to emerge from the chrysalis. The process of breaking out of the chrysalis pumps blood through the new wings so that they can unfurl strongly into the beautiful and functional apparatus the butterfly requires to fly. So the struggles I am now encountering in the transition of single life into marriage and motherhood are par for the course. I should not let them get me down, nor stay down for too long.
After all, I have been practising for years now for this vocation and I finally get to do it for real. These are thrilling and exciting times. Never mind the occasional cut or bruise. That should not stop me. Nothing should stop me. Just as little Moana of Motunui and little Diana of Themyscira had a sense of who they were to become when they grew up, I, too, have that same intuition. I, too, am made for greatness, to move hearts, change lives, and make the world a better place.
As I prayed the Novena to the Holy Spirit for the seven gifts of wisdom, understanding, counsel, fortitude, knowledge, piety and fear of the Lord, I came to a better understanding of my struggles and what powers my fears. I thank God for the gift of the Holy Spirit this Pentecost, for, with Him, I can rejoice in my struggles and celebrate my fears. I pray for His constant presence to aid me in all my endeavours and make change a blessing I can bestow on others.
When life pulls the rug from underneath our feet, we moan and wail, ready to give up and walk away? How did we lose the innate confidence we had as children that we were born to walk, and thus, we never stop attempting to stand up again and walk, even after we have fallen the gadzillionth time. We are bold, intrepid beings, undeterred by failure. Adversity is swatted away by chubby fingers and blithe spirits.
Having hit an emotional speed bump lately I have been reflecting on where I am right now - why am I struggling so much, and what is it that I am being put through my paces to learn? P mentioned last Friday evening that emotional crises are brought upon by transitions in life. I guess that must be it. I am currently still transitioning into married life.
Don't get me wrong, I can see practically almost every blessing I receive in this new season of life, and I am filled with gratitude and joy. But, to be honest, there are things I mourn deeply and I grapple with change (why can't certain things stay the way they were). I suffer a sense of guilt for having left certain things, certain people, behind. I keep telling myself not to look back, lest I become like Lot's wife, paralyzed and unable to move forward in my new life.
Then there are the growing pains, and the need to find balance and inner harmony when thrown into a completely new arena fraught with complexities to negotiate. I am impatient to get on with it and acquire a certain level of expertise that can only come with time. Instead, I wish to fast forward life and skip the struggles, knowing full well that going through it all is necessary in order for insight and wisdom to come.
When Father Romeo said change was a blessing in our lives during his weekend homily, I almost groaned. I don't dispute that change can be wonderful, but I take issue with how it can be strange-awkward painful, causing me to struggle before a new equilibrium is found.
In order to fly, the butterfly must struggle to emerge from the chrysalis. The process of breaking out of the chrysalis pumps blood through the new wings so that they can unfurl strongly into the beautiful and functional apparatus the butterfly requires to fly. So the struggles I am now encountering in the transition of single life into marriage and motherhood are par for the course. I should not let them get me down, nor stay down for too long.
After all, I have been practising for years now for this vocation and I finally get to do it for real. These are thrilling and exciting times. Never mind the occasional cut or bruise. That should not stop me. Nothing should stop me. Just as little Moana of Motunui and little Diana of Themyscira had a sense of who they were to become when they grew up, I, too, have that same intuition. I, too, am made for greatness, to move hearts, change lives, and make the world a better place.
As I prayed the Novena to the Holy Spirit for the seven gifts of wisdom, understanding, counsel, fortitude, knowledge, piety and fear of the Lord, I came to a better understanding of my struggles and what powers my fears. I thank God for the gift of the Holy Spirit this Pentecost, for, with Him, I can rejoice in my struggles and celebrate my fears. I pray for His constant presence to aid me in all my endeavours and make change a blessing I can bestow on others.
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