Wednesday, February 06, 2013

Good enough

Many of my friends ask me what is the secret of my mother's youthful appearance. Just seven weeks shy of her 80th birthday, she rarely gets mistaken for a senior citizen.

While my tongue-in-cheek response is daily afternoon naps, I believe the true reason why my mother looks and feels young, apart from her excellent genetic pedigree, is her attitude to life.

She is grateful and content with her life, has always been, and in the words of Psalm 23, she does not want. She does not hanker for things or experiences, she does not yearn for what she cannot get, therefore the simple pleasures in life satisfy her and make her happy.

Her attitude goes counter to current social norms where nothing is ever enough, where more means better. More material wealth, more love, more of everything equals happiness and therefore all ends justify the means taken to attain them.

Innate in us all are desires and dreams that push us to survive and flourish in life, that's our biology. But spiritually, we are built for transcendence, to go beyond ourselves and be more; to strive toward goodness, toward God.

Unfortunately, we now live in a world that emphasizes taking and not giving, using instead of serving, thus we remain stuck at the bottom of Maslow's pyramid, never moving up to self-actualization.

We focus so much on our own benefit that we become rabidly acquisitive, degenerating into greedy and selfish beings. We even fight and kill, commit unspeakable crimes in order to gain power, territory, wealth and love, whatever we want or desire.

We forget that true, lasting happiness comes from within, not without, and when we aspire toward goodness, we are well on the way to finding happiness as we most value it. Happiness is so not a Lamborghini Miura or a crocodile Birkin with gold and diamond hardware, lust-worthy as they are.

In past Sunday's Gospel (Luke 4:21-30), Jesus made the townspeople furious when He intimated that God's word and blessings were for everyone and not just the Chosen People.

As Father Stephen pointed out in his homily, the truth is "we, who are the Church, already have enough of God’s blessings.  In fact we are the ones who should be giving thanks and gratitude to God, and we should teach others to do likewise."

He could be talking about my mother for she teaches me this life lesson every day, that the joys and sorrows, achievements and failures, gains and losses of each day are enough, as long as we share in the joys and sorrows, achievements and failures, gains and losses of those around us, and we give thanks to God for being there with us every step of the way.

To me, she exemplifies love as it is defined in the second reading of 1 Corinthians 13 for she is patient, kind and truthful; not envious, boastful, proud or self-seeking; but trusting, full of hope and persevering. I can only aspire to love as she loves, not demanding more out of life.

Although Mum has had her fair share of tough times and is a breast cancer survivor, her lack of bitterness, regret or anger and her lack of demands keep her young at heart, and in mind and body.

For life, as it is, is good enough.

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