Living a passion-driven life

When I attended a community meeting* last evening, I was not the only one who was completely knackered from a gruelling, hard-paced week and who had to force myself to turn up. God faithfully rewarded our grit.

Many thanks to Derek Chong who had himself just finished a full day of teaching, exhausted yet eager to lead us in a discussion about mission and passion. By the end of the evening, our passions were ignited, and we left for home feeling blessed, happy, complete, uplifted, united, excited and encouraged. 

In order to evangelize effectively as a community, we need to first identify our own individual passions so that when we come together on mission, we will intentionally tap on the different and unique passions of each person and present a powerful, transformational front: we will witness as one, cohesive whole - with Christ as our head - and empower those we meet to live in the fullness of life, and with great joy.

It is therefore also important that we know why we exist as community so as to know what we want to do and who we want to reach out to; we need to vocalize clearly and internalize a shared sense of mission.

As we shared our views with one another, it became apparent we came from different perspectives and desires and yet, these very differences displayed the beauty of community, a unity in diversity. In spite of our different views and temperaments, we ultimately shared a common goal that can be distilled in one phrase: to know Christ and make Him known.

Derek encouraged each of us to share our passions with one another, stressing the importance of living out our passions. He reminded us that whatever our pain and happiness were connected directly to our passions. Questions to ask include what pains me and makes me want to change the world? What excites and energizes me? What makes me come alive and brings meaning to my life? It is only when we connect to our personal passions that we can then work together as a team and become part of a successful outreach. There is still much for my community to digest and work through, but we are excited.

Being more intuitive, it was good for me to analyze my passions for I have since been able to articulate them more fully. This is valuable for I better understand what fulfils me, and I can now put more energy into living out my passions mindfully. It is pointless and draining to do otherwise.

It goes without saying that living a passion-driven life is not all high octane tripping and barrel loads of fun for it will encompass sacrifice, disappointment, hard work and perseverance.

It will require us to overcome our fears and insecurities, to put out into the deep against better judgement born of human intellect.

It can get chaotic, messy and require greater, and painful, surrender to God’s will.

It will expose our weaknesses and push us to take flying leaps of faith off cliffs of unimaginable heights.

It will be terrifying, stressful, demanding and arduous. At the same time, it will be exhilarating, enriching, fulfilling and life-changing.   

When we talk passion we usually mean something that we do in our free time, an avocation, or a distant dream. The prevailing sentiment is if we are unusually lucky, we get to enjoy what we do at work. I would like to propose that you reconsider if you do think of passion in those terms.

Passion should be an integral part of your life’s labour. You should be spending most of your waking hours pursuing your passions. Passions are dreams God has placed in your heart. They are shaped by your life experiences, constantly being refined as you evolve and grow. Do not let them wither and die out of sheer cluelessness or deadly procrastination. Discover them and nurture them so you can live each new day with great expectations and joyful verve, and accomplish great things along the way. 

Make passion a habitual way of living. 

* I belong to the Institute for World Evangelisation ICPE Mission Singapore as a Companion.

Getting rid of dead wood

When I was growing up, an aunt of mine would pronounce that because I was Cancerian, I was moody. At seven or eight, when an adult speaks, you presume it is the truth, so I was a moody, difficult and bad-tempered child instead of the shy, reserved and sensitive child I really was.   

The negative labels of my childhood still exist, much to my consternation. Moody, difficult, prickly - a personality only a mother would love (thank God she does). This is how I imagine others perceive me and therefore I proceed to behave accordingly, painting myself into a self-fulfilling prophetic corner when what I really want is to behave in the opposite manner. Inside I am moaning I am really not like this, I am actually quite funny, cheerful, and I can be considerate and flexible.

I know I will never completely outgrow my distortions and quirks, but I can try letting go of these negative labels for they are a poor reflection of who I am, so why let them control my behaviour?    

Last Sunday’s Gospel from John, chapter 15, encourages me to allow the Vinedresser to prune all the dead, fruitless branches of my being so that I can be more fruitful. I used to focus only on losing my faults and weaknesses but I now realize that these negative labels still emblazoned on my person need to be cut off as well.  

I like what Father Arro said in his homily. In order to be a growing branch of the true vine, I must live eagerly and the way to do it is to be in communion with others. This means interacting with people, putting myself into situations which may not be comfortable but will make a positive difference (especially for me when I challenge my distortions). To love people for who they are, even the ones who do not deserve it or who make me want to retreat is tough. But that’s what Jesus did. And He is the vine of which I am a branch.

Remain in me, as I also remain in you. This call to mindfulness is fundamental to growing in a wholesome and fruitful manner as disciple. If I keep my being centred on Christ, then my actions will be motivated by Him and I will not be handicapped by my less admirable inclinations or the childish need to be accepted. Pruning away the dead wood can be a painful and tedious process at times, but the results after speak for themselves.

I can talk and walk with integrity and others will feel loved and inspired by me. I can even be like the disciples of old, confident and bold in God's Spirit. I will grow in holiness and contribute much in building God’s kingdom of mercy and joy.

If you remain in me and my words remain in you, ask whatever you wish, and it will be done for you.

This is the promise that gives me the most hope for it tells me I can excise the negative labels of my childhood, plus, I get to do great things glorifying the Father’s name.

You can do it, too. Just remain in Him.  

Saint Teresa of Los Andes

During our W2W Ministry meeting last Friday, we learned about a saint who died before she was 20, Saint Teresa of Jesus of Los Andes, Chile's first saint who was canonized in 1993.

How did a slip of a girl who began her journey to become a Carmelite nun in 1919 only to die of typhus eleven months later become a saint?

Why would 100,000 pilgrims visit her shrine every year seeking inspiration on joy and guidance on attaining a direct relationship with God?

What is it about Saint Teresa of Los Andes that appeals so much to people, especially young people, who hunger for transcendent love and happiness?

Juana or Juanita as she was known by close friends and family wrote in her diary she was drawn to God as early as the age of six. After she made her First Holy Communion at age 10 she underwent a complete transformation from self-centred, stubborn and proud to selfless, loving and beatifically prayerful.

Respecting the sanctity of the Eucharist, Juanita had actively sought, prior her First Communion, to acquire virtues to make herself worthy of receiving Christ within her. In turn, God answered her love for Him with the mystical grace of interior locution or private revelation.

Juanita possessed an enormous capacity to love and to be loved joined with an extraordinary intelligence. God allowed her to experience his presence. With this knowledge he purified her and made her his own through what it entails to take up the cross. Knowing him, she loved him; and loving him, she bound herself totally to him.*

As she grew older, so deep was her love for God that Juanita decided to consecrate her life by becoming a Discalced Carmelite when she was 14 and she made a vow of chastity when she was 15. She eventually began her novitiate in May 1919 at age 19 where she conducted a brief but powerful apostolate of letter-writing before her death in April 1920.

In her letters and through the way she lived her life, Teresa of Los Andes confirms for us that God exists, that God is love and happiness, and that he is our fulfilment. She radiated exuberance, joy and an unwavering conviction that following Jesus is the one and only thing worth the effort, that gives us true happiness.

As she wrote in one letter:

God is my heaven here below. I live with him. Even when I am walking, we speak together without being interrupted by anyone. If you would know him enough, you would love him. If you would stay with him for one hour, you would know heaven on earth.

She was in love with him and ready each moment to crucify herself for him... The holiness of her life shone out in the everyday occurrences, wherever she found herself: at home, in college, with friends, the people she stayed with on holidays. To all, with apostolic zeal, she spoke of God and gave assistance. She was young like her friends, but they knew she was different. They took her as a model, seeking her support and advice.

Nothing is more attractive than a person who is genuinely lovely and who seeks the good of others; who has got it all together and yet is so humble and sensitive that your sensibilities are not offended or threatened in any way.

How did she do it? She simply loved God with all her heart, soul, strength and mind and then loved her neighbour as she loved herself (Luke 10:27). She gave herself over to prayer, to the acquiring of virtue and the practice of a life in accord with the Gospel. Simple. Not easy. But possible.

Yesterday was Good Shepherd Sunday and Father Arro shared that the only way he could have sustained his priesthood of near 60 years was through love, God's love. We are all not just sheep who hear the Master's voice but shepherds who lead because we are loved and we want to spread that love to others.

Love is the supernatural grace that must be paid forward, especially today when our Christian way of life is scorned, hated and persecuted. A little lambkin, Juanita, shows us how we can achieve this.

Saint Teresa of Jesus of Los Andes, pray for us that we may, like you, be transformative symbols of God's love in the world.

* http://www.vatican.va/news_services/liturgy/saints/ns_lit_doc_19930321_teresa-de-jesus_en.html

Loving our trials and tribulations

Two days ago, I awoke early morning to the incredibly loud thud of a body landing on top of a tiled roof and the sound of broken tiles clattering to the ground below. A woman had jumped off the 24th floor just minutes before 7am and landed on the roof of the sheltered walkway.

My immediate reaction was deep sadness when I finally knew what had happened and I prayed for the soul of this unknown woman. hoping that the police would be able to identify her soon and inform her family.

Then the questions came. Why? No matter how bad life is, it is not worth taking your own life, is it? Surely there is always a way out? As I pondered I became increasingly aware that I am truly blessed for I have never, at any point in my life thus far, experienced such agonizing despair and yawning loneliness that I would consider suicide as an option. I know I have the Lord to thank for this.

Even in periods when I turned away from God and His ways, distancing myself deliberately, I always knew that the Father was there for me and that He would walk with me through the darkest valleys of my life, a reassuring presence.

This inalienable belief in the Almighty's boundless and forgiving love is a gift I have always held within my grasp even if I have not always fully appreciated its value or respected its power. No matter what I do, however heinous or catastrophic, I know I will always be forgiven, never abandoned and deeply cherished; as long as I repent and turn to Jesus.

I also know this, that I can do all things through Christ who strengthens me, Saint Paul told the Philippians, and this statement has buoyed me through the worst days of my life with supernatural grace.

The other gift I have is my family history. I come from a family of survivors, people who have journeyed thousands of miles in search of a better life and have weathered privation, turbulent times and oppression without compromising their Christian principles.

I grew up knowing life may not be fair or easy, it may involve great suffering, but nothing can defeat me - not even rejection from people I know or love as long as I strive for truth, honesty, justice and love in everything I do.

My father taught me to walk to the beat of one drummer, the Almighty, and no other. This simplifies life for me, for as long as I keep His commandments, I can truthfully say I know the Father and hopefully, I also radiate the love of God to others in an encouraging manner (see 1 John 2:1-6).

We listened to A sharing the life of Saint Bernadette Friday evening and we were all amazed by Saint Bernadette's strength of character. She did not let the disapprobation that greeted her over Our Lady's apparitions to her shake her, nor did she allow the persecution she experienced from her Superior and fellow nuns faze her. She understood that her tribulations on earth did not define her and knew what she needed to do in order to persevere in her walk.

I must die to myself continually and accept trials without complaining. I work, I suffer and I love with no other witness than his heart. Anyone who is not prepared to suffer all for the Beloved and to do his will in all things is not worthy of the sweet name of Friend, for here below, Love without suffering does not exist.

What really struck me was this other quote of hers for it resonates with my own experience of tough times:

I shall spend every moment loving. One who loves does not notice her trials; or perhaps more accurately, she is able to love them.

In his homily today, Father Valerian spoke about what it means to witness: to die for the faith, to martyr oneself. Church Father Tertullian wrote that "the blood of martyrs is the seed of the Church" and Saint Bernadette exemplifies this with her life lived in quiet, undramatic but heroic service and humility.

I cannot pretend to understand what led to the woman taking her own life off the top of my residential block but I am humbled that because I know Jesus, I have the resources to overcome fear, loss, pain and suffering. And, I have a healthy perspective on suffering and the sanctity of life.

My hope from last Friday's disturbing experience is that I can share the joy I have found in my relationship with Jesus with others more effectively and help people understand that there is always a way out of darkness, a way to new life. Do not give up! His love can carry us through the worst of times. He is in our midst, a comforting and protective presence if we turn to Him and really look at Him with child-like trust in our eyes.

Growing in Divine Mercy

In conversation with different friends through the course of last week, they have found people to be unfriendly and even downright aggressive without provocation. It does not take much to even get friends upset for people are so protective of their own rights and views as individuals that they are intolerant of their friends' alternative points of view.

There is no room for dialogue, no attempt to understand, and no benefit of the doubt is given for others' perceived failings and foibles. No longer do we walk a mile in others' shoes to empathize and therefore forgive their shortcomings.

B said to me it is as if all the stars and planets are not in alignment for everyone around her is in disagreement. I put it down to city living where we are stressed out, suffering from lack of sleep, and always in a rush to get somewhere so don't let anybody get in my way. Technology doesn't help for we plug into it and purposefully create a distance between ourselves and others. The focus is therefore insular and narcissistic.

Today's Feast of the Divine Mercy is a timely reminder to me to not give in to the lack of mercy I find all around me. It is all too easy for me to get irritated and criticize others' behaviour and consequently act like a rigid, humourless, self-righteous and perfect idiot who knows it all.

I don't want to be that person for it is so bad for my health, physically and spiritually. What will help me in becoming and staying the joyful Easter person I aspire to is Divine Mercy. On my own I will fail, but if I rely on God's unending source of mercy and emulate Jesus, who forgave even those who caused His death, then I have a good chance.

As Father John Bosco reminded us today at mass, the water and blood that flowed from Jesus's pierced side represents baptism, the Eucharist and healing. When Jesus asked Thomas to touch His side, it was an act of love, while the wound itself was one of love and mercy. I have never seen it that way but Father JB was right. Instead of getting impatient or frustrated, Jesus reached out to Thomas lovingly, forgiving him his doubtful pessimism or lack of faith.

Because Jesus was gentle with Thomas, Thomas was sold. My Lord and my God. He was completely transformed because Jesus did not give up on him. Thomas would later travel to "the ends of the earth" to preach the Good News, going as far as India where he would die for his religious zeal.

This is what an act of love can do. It can make a radical difference. It can heal and change people for the better. It can be redemptive, a moment of grace, not just for the receiver but for the giver as well.

Love as the world celebrates and obsesses over is usually of the romantic ilk and more self-serving, but love in its purest form is the willingness to undergo suffering for the good of the other and that is the variety and quality of love I want in my life.

It is patient, kind, forbearing, forgiving, enduring, full of hope and all the wonderful things enumerated by Saint Paul in his first letter to the Corinthians, chapter 13. This is the love that flows from the Sacred Heart of Jesus, a salvific love that can be mine, and yours.

To celebrate this great feast properly, I resolve to constantly ask for mercy, divine, no less, and to immerse myself in it. Hopefully I will be like the sinful woman in Luke's Gospel in chapter seven who because she experienced forgiveness for a great many sins showed great love, and mercy.

For the sake of His sorrowful passion, have mercy on us, and on the whole world. 

Living the risen life

When I was little, Easter was something I looked forward to for I would get chocolate eggs from my grandparents and there was such a festive air when the extended family gathered together to eat. I loved, and still love singing the Easter Song for it is so full of joy.

Now my people don't you weep, He has risen from the sleep, He lives again. Alleluia!

To be able to sing Alleluia without restraint after the sombre season of Lent invokes an exuberance that is supremely satisfying. The Lord is risen! Praise God! Alleluia!

Understanding today the significance of Easter with an adult sensitivity, the sense of gladness I experienced as a child is still present, and enhanced by a deep gratitude and wonder (what did I do to deserve this selfless and unconditional love?).

It is precisely because I did not do anything to deserve this gift of redemption, the chance to make good on mistakes or golden opportunities cavalierly treated that makes it all the more felicitous and precious.

When one receives a piece of good news, the first reaction is to tell someone else, especially if it can make them happy as well. So what kind of response does the Easter message of risen life call forth from me besides joy? The reflection from Laudate reminds me there are "new challenges and new responsibilities, especially in evangelization."

Satan couldn't prevent the resurrection of Jesus from the dead, so now he is reduced to trying to stop us from spreading the good news that Jesus is alive and has conquered sin and death forever. Satan tries to limit the spread of the good news is to tempt Jesus' witnesses to be afraid, afraid of evangelizing, afraid of radical lifestyle changes, afraid of stepping out in faith, afraid of change. If Satan can take hold of at least a part of us, he's well on his way to reducing us from a half-witness to no witness at all.

This reflection really challenges me; why am I not spreading the good news of the Risen Lord in a bigger way? After all, we the undeserving are forgiven. We the sinners are beloved and redeemed. The darkness and hopelessness that oppressively crowds life is illuminated by this singular act of dying on the cross that triumphantly transmogrifies into resurrection. Evil is overcome. Death is not a tragic end but the beginning of a hope-filled, new life. A risen life.

Meeting a couple of good friends yesterday reminded me that family life can be difficult. The seeds of pride, envy, greed and unforgiving anger can sow discord and despair within even the most loving of families.

All families are broken because all individuals that make up a family are broken in different ways. I can be my loving best and yet at times my loving best descends into unkind words and actions, cowardly silence, lazy or defeated inaction and even a vicious meanness I would disapprove in others. I cannot seem to help myself and fear often dictates my immature and selfish behaviour.

But if Jesus can defeat death, so can I. I can defeat the death dealing actions of my brokenness if I recognize and train my focus on the Risen Lord. This is the Easter promise. This is how I can be an Easter person, a person of joy and hope - within my own family and with others I meet. This is how I can make the difference, by meeting Him in the tomb and responding with faith to His call: Out of darkness I call you to bring light to others.

Make tomorrow a light-filled Easter day.

Entering into Holy Week

With Palm Sunday we have entered Holy Week, this most holy of seasons in our liturgical calendar. As I participated in the Passion narrative at mass today, this question to God popped into my head. Why do You love me so much?

This question first pinged my consciousness last Thursday as I reflected in front of the Holy Eucharist during the Penitential Service. I am so imperfect. I fall so easily, Every day I sin. I am so faithless in actions despite my repeated professions of love.

Today Father Joe (so nice to see you Father Joe, it's been a long while - missed your plain talking homilies.) talked about the cast of characters to be found in the Passion narrative and asked us which one do we identify with this Lent. Even if I discover I am Judas, he encouraged not to be afraid to acknowledge the truth for then I can work on doing something positive about it.

Funnily enough who caught my attention today is not one of the main protagonists but the man wearing only a linen cloth and who left the linen cloth in the guards' hands as he ran away naked. That is me, the one who runs away in fear, not caring if I have exposed myself to greater danger by being so vulnerable. On the other hand, being naked means I have nothing more to lose or hide. It's just me that comes before Jesus this week. A sincere gift of self with all my blemishes and rolls of gluttonous, slothful fat.

The whole point of Holy Week is sacrifice; not just the reminder of the Pascal sacrifice, but my final push to make this Lenten season one of personal growth and accomplishment. For all my failures throughout Lent to stay faithful to what I wanted to do, I can make the conscious effort this week to make it happen.

Father Joe pointed out Lee Kuan Yew sacrificed his life to give us a beautiful home in Singapore, we can surely sacrifice a little time and effort to make a difference and give back not just to God, but to the ones around us, using this holiest of weeks to effect the change.

It was a poignant send off for Mr Lee today. Even the skies wept as the cortege moved slowly from Parliament House to the funeral service in the University Cultural Centre. The true testament to our founding father's spirit would be if all Singaporeans decide to move forward boldly and cohesively as "one united people, regardless of race, language or religion".

I can begin by standing up to my own personal challenges and working on them, starting this Holy Week. At least then I can say to Jesus although I do not know why You love me so much, I can justify it by being more like You. 

Farewell Mr Lee

On Monday, March 23, at 3:18am, Mr Lee Kuan Yew, former prime minister of Singapore, passed away at age 91 after fighting pneumonia and a chest infection for over six weeks. I was greatly saddened by the news for I had hoped he would pull through in order to celebrate Singapore's 50th birthday come August. It would have been fitting for much of what we have accomplished is due largely to his painstaking efforts. As founding father, he gave his life in service for the success of Singapore. 

The more I read and listened to stories about how he worked so tirelessly and passionately to make this nation a better place for all who live here and how he put Singapore on the map, the more my respect and love for the man deepened.

While I personally did not agree with some of his past policies or how they were rammed down our throats without finesse, he is, without a doubt, a visionary, a great leader who parlayed the dismal fate of a tiny island with no resources into a shining example of political stability and economic development lauded by the world.

Reading Minister Heng Swee Keat's tribute Mr Lee's Red Box* shed light on Mr Lee's work ethic and passion. He lived and breathed Singapore and never stopped for a moment even when personal tragedy struck. He was truly a servant leader, putting national interest above personal comfort.

Being a romantic, what really touched me as a woman was his deep love, respect and devotion for his wife. Especially when it mattered, when she was in a locked-in, vegetative state, he would visit her faithfully every evening, spend time with her, reading to her the news or her favourite poems. Then there is his final request (honouring his late wife's wishes) to have his ashes mingled with hers so that they could be joined together in death as they were in life.

Naturally he has his detractors. He had to make unpalatable, hard line choices and he has made mistakes as hindsight as proven, but as he rightfully pointed out in his book Hard Truths:

I did what I thought was right, given the circumstances, given my knowledge at the time, given the pressures on me at the time. That’s finished, done. I move forward. You keep on harking back, it’s just wasting time.

I can certainly learn much from this, as I can from Mr Lee's insatiable curiosity, humility, integrity, guts, great listening skills, iron discipline and straight shooting style. We do not get to where we want to be without hard work, sacrifice, failure and perseverance. We do not become architects of change by playing in the shallows timidly, wearing blinkers or running for popularity contests.

Thank you Mr Lee Kuan Yew for devoting your entire life towards making Singapore this beautiful, safe, stable, culturally harmonious, somewhat egalitarian Garden City I call home. I may not always appreciate the heavy handed, oftentimes draconian, way of doing things, but I am profoundly grateful and proud to be Singaporean because you, Sir, have given me the opportunity to grow up and live in dignity, freedom and material comfort.

Thank you for running the good race. You were indeed the good and faithful servant (Matthew 25:23) leader. Requiescat in pace. You will be greatly missed.

* https://www.facebook.com/hengsweekeat/posts/870264306345429:0

24 hours for the Lord

Pope Francis invited all Catholics to participate in 24 hours for the Lord this 13 - 14 March as a mid-Lenten exercise where we avail ourselves of the Sacrament of Reconciliation as well as pray and spend time in Eucharistic Adoration.

There was a theme: "God Rich in Mercy" (Ephesians 2:4). If ever there is a time for mercy, it is today where people are unforgiving, mistrustful and mostly self-serving.

It does not help us that we live in a world where many worship the gods of self-reliance and material wealth turning even believers into greedy and narcissistic children.

Our prayers reflect an immature, demanding tone, and when we do not get what we want, we turn our backs on God in anger and bitterness. Our relationship with God never transcends the superficial and transactional.

Lord, I believe in you and trust you only if you answer my prayers as I call them. Do try and get it right. Don't go off on a tangent and give me something I clearly did not ask for. Were you even listening to me?

If I am a good person and keep all the commandments, God, you should be answering my prayers - spoken with the self-righteous petulance of the Prodigal Son's brother.

What does it mean for me that God is rich in mercy? It means that I am able to acknowledge and be grateful for His primacy and loving authority over my life every day. Father knows best and He never stops loving me and giving generously. All the time.

It means I treat Him with respect and love, all the time, instead of shunting Him to one side as I make my way through life, speaking to Him only when I hit a roadblock.

It also means that having received His grace, I need to reflect His mercy to others by reaching out to others with joy and doing good deeds enthusiastically, whether appreciated or deserved. That translates into not judging others or giving up on others. If Saint Monica can pray for her husband for 30 years and her son for 17 years before both experienced conversion then I must persevere. The world would have been more arid and dim if Saint Monica had given up on her errant son, Saint Augustine, one of humankind's great treasures.

Just Monday past I attended the funeral mass of my recently deceased neighbour, a diminutive, white-haired, old lady named Alice. She is my inspiration for she would toddle off for evening mass every day without fail. On the occasions when our paths crossed, she would smile and impart words of encouragement.

Always be humble she advised frequently, citing examples of how her pride would trip her up. Love God, which she did wholeheartedly through her lifestyle. Her children recounted how in the four remaining days of her life as she lay on a hospital bed she would clamour to make her way to evening mass whenever 5:30pm rolled around.

When one seeks God out so regularly and faithfully, one cannot but be transformed. She exuded the goodness of God in every pore. Aunty Alice will be missed not only by her family but all of us whose lives she graced with her sweet and cheerful presence, and her stalwart fidelity.

Although the 24 hours for the Lord is over, I will continue to seek opportunities to be with Jesus 24/7 and why not? My life belongs to Him and I should give thanks for every breath I take. As Muriel Donnelly concluded in The Second Best Exotic Marigold Hotel there's no present like the time.

Celebrating womanhood

My SD is fond of telling me that women were created to make the world a more beautiful place; only women, not men, can grace an occasion. Here is a man, a priest, who appreciates beauty as a truth created by God, and has a deep respect, and love, for women and men alike.

To all women reading this, I agree with my SD wholeheartedly and encourage all my sisters (brothers too) out there to respect their bodies as temples of God by looking after appearances without vain obsession, and looking after minds and spirits without becoming self-absorbed.

Women, do not let yourselves go. No matter how old you are, do not give in to gluttony and allow the pounds to pile on. Being overweight taxes your joints and organs, and leads to serious medical issues sooner rather than later.

Eat healthily and moderately so as to maintain optimum health (eat junk and you will soon feel like junk) and exercise regularly to ensure suppleness and grace when you move, it is pointless to put effort into looking good only to shuffle like a 90-year-old with shoulders hunched over, head forward.

Regular exercise has many benefits. You get your blood circulation going and you even release endorphins into your system so you feel good. It also helps you maintain muscle mass and keeps osteoporosis at bay.

Maintaining neuromuscular coordination helps upkeep your vestibular system and balance so you decrease the risk of falls. I could go on but I am sure you get the picture by now.

One last thing, you should not experience pain or stiffness when you move any body part (barring any serious accidents or health conditions). If you do, it is a sign to do something about it so that you come back to a pain-free state.

Experiencing pain in every step is not acceptable (as I write this I am not pain-free myself but I am working hard at getting there). Popping pills may be a quick fix but ruinous to your health - best to reduce any chemical reliance you might have.

So you work out, you watch your diet, and you look and feel reasonably decent. Great. Let's talk dressing. I am no expert and I admit to dressing down as much as I can to combat the tropical heat but I do try to go for casual chic rather than casual sloppy.

Modesty does not mean greasy, unkempt hair, baggy T-shirts or shapeless garments and flip flops. Look and smell good. Dress age appropriately. Aim to please the senses without causing a lustful reaction. Sexiness is a state of mind and not the state of undress which leaves nothing to the imagination.

Sisters, do not sell yourself short. Do not give in to the prevalent world view of how a woman should dress or behave if it means objectifying yourself or causing others to objectify you. Men you attract purely on the merits of your figure or easy virtue are not worth holding onto in the long run. Superficial and immature, there's not much to stop them from leaving you for a hotter and younger bod.

Demand to be loved for who you are and not what you are, how you look or how others want you to be. Walk and talk like a lady if you wish to be treated like a lady. Swearing or crude language is not becoming, even in a man. If you begin by respecting yourself in how you present yourself to the world, others will accord you a similar respect.

Let's not stop at looking one's best. We can further beautify the world through our behaviour, by speaking and acting with feminine grace.

As women, we are gifted with intuition, a softer and nurturing nature, and the ability to believe and hope in the goodness of others beyond logic or reason. We connect more easily than men with others, and we are more in touch with and articulate about our emotions. Rather than rejecting what is often perceived as weakness, we should celebrate our vulnerability and use it to empower others to be freer, and therefore better people.

Grow into your vocation as woman be it as daughter, sister, friend, colleague, wife, mother, grandmother or godmother. We can transform our environment when we exercise our feminine gifts with gentle integrity and quiet confidence. Our receptivity and creativity can give birth to life in more ways than just biologically. Use your talents to bring joy and comfort to others.

Be proud of your sexuality. Thank God for it and walk humbly, virtuously and with great dignity. If you are unsure of how you should act, let Mother Mary be your model. Mary was a woman who took everything to God in prayer and emerged with insights born of faith.

Be the woman God created you to be: beautiful, liberated and brimming with joy. Happy Women's Day.

Here I am

Last Sunday's first reading of the testing of Abraham inspires me to be a little more like Abraham, especially this Lenten season.

Here is a man who has remained steadfast and true to God his entire life despite major setbacks. First, he endured the curse of a childless marriage. Then, just when he should be taking things easy and enjoying life, he is asked to pack up and go to a new land on a ridiculous promise of abundance: descendants as countless as the stars in the sky or the grains of sand on the seashore. But he goes.

He is finally blessed with one son, Isaac. Okay, so God appears to be making good on His promise. Just as he luxuriates in the blessings of fatherhood God does a number on him. Offer his son as a sacrifice back to God. So what happened to the countless descendants if Isaac dies? Both he and Sarah are well into their 90s, is another miracle birth probable?

I like how Abraham responded. Here I am. How often do I say that to God?  To present myself fully in one heart, mind and body; to be attentive, open and obedient.

What great effort did it cost Abraham to follow God's instructions to the T, yet he did so seemingly without flinching. Here I am. Ready to slit Isaac's throat even as his own heart must've been breaking. As the reflection from Laudate pronounced:

Abraham is the father of faith because he put his hope in the promises of God. Faith makes us taste in advance the light of God's glory when we shall see him face to face.

Through the eyes of faith Abraham recognized God and God's call on his life. He saw from afar not only what God intended for him, but for his descendants as well - an everlasting covenant of friendship and peace with the living God.

Abraham could see beyond his impending grievous loss, to see past his own humans wants and needs out of his deep love for God. He was willing to die to self in the present to be able to see God face to face in the future.

Even though I share the same conviction of eternal life as Abraham does, and a similar deep love and reverence for God, I am not sure I can be as biddable as he was. And yet, I do desire to have a faith as unshakeable as his was.

What do I need to do to nurture such a vigorous and lively faith? It took Abraham a lifetime of regular, constant prayer, and a life engaged actively in good works to attain his high level of faith. Out of his habitual obedience he could hear God's whispers clearly and say in a heartbeat: Here I am. I am yours.

I hope to make this Lent a springboard to aligning my will to God's as much as Abraham's was. This requires me to stay awake spiritually so that I can be as attentive as Abraham  was. The reflection from Laudate put it across best:

How much do we miss of God's glory and action because we are asleep spiritually?  There are many things which can keep our minds asleep to the things of God: Mental lethargy and the "unexamined life" can keep us from thinking things through and facing our doubts and questions. The life of ease can also hinder us from considering the challenging or disturbing demands of Christ.  Prejudice can make us blind to something new the Lord may have for us. Even sorrow can be a block until we can see past it to the glory of God. 

I thank God for the robust and constant faith of Abraham, a true inspiration during this season of Lent. Here I am, Lord. I am yours.

Travelling from beach to desert

Vacationing in a beach destination is a little like being in Sodom and Gomorrah. You are surrounded by people intent only on pleasures of the flesh. Everyone is there to have a good time and there is a propensity to overindulge.

Among the many vacationers comprising many families, friends and couples, you also see couples who are clearly involved in mere transactional relationships. No judgement on older, male foreigners and nubile, female locals who alternate between looking bored and acting coquettish, what you have is dross, nothing one can call meaningful or significant.

Is this so wrong, filling the need for companionship by paying for it or staving off loneliness by exchanging bodily fluids so casually? Yes, it is, for love is so trivialized and altered that it is an indistinct facsimile of the real thing.

Worse, we soon believe such relationships founded on lust to be the standard of love in our lives and we no longer bother to search for the genuine article for it is too elusive and takes too much effort to attain.

We become fast food people in our way of life. We seek instant gratification and are willing to consume what appeals only to the senses but in actual fact is bad for us on many levels.

We look only for the easier, faster way of attaining pleasure without wanting to sacrifice time and effort on our part. We grow lazy, selfish and become users of people.

We forget about God and eschew His ways for who wants to fast, abstain, spend time in prayer or give alms when one could be having fun? We fail to understand that being good and following God's ways does not necessitate giving up pleasure, and yet, this is the biggest misperception of Christianity.

The salvific beauty of Christianity and the call of Lent is to return and repent. It calls for a period of conversion, a time of purification where we seek a time of solitude, prayer and fasting in the desert so as to prepare our hearts to enter more deeply into our covenantal relationship with God.

Whether we recognize it or not, this relationship exists between every single human being and God and when we choose to develop it, especially during the Lenten season, we will experience a deep and lasting joy that cannot be found in the surfeit of food, drink, sex and pleasure one indulges in on vacation, or at home.

Why would I want to surrender my will to God in a way that means deprivation for me? What is the upside?

Father Robert Barron writes that in life, there is a pull toward hedonism - the philosophy that the good life is the physically -satisfying life. Food, drink, sex, material things, money, comfort, a secure sense of the future are the supreme values for many, especially in our culture.

Many, many people throughout history are waylaid by this powerful temptation. It is appealing because the desires are so basic. Thomas Merton said that the sensual desires - for food, comfort, pleasure, and sex - are like children in that they are so immediate and so insistent.

But our lives will never expand to greater depth as long as we are dominated by our physical desires. This is why in so many of the initiation rituals of primal peoples, something like fasting or deprivation is essential. It is also why initiation into a demanding form of life, like the military, often involves the deprivation of sensual pleasures.

When we give way to this temptation, it shuts down the soul, for the soul has been wired for God, for journey into the divine. When sensual desire dominates, those deeper and richer desires are never felt or followed. They are, as Merton said, like little children, constantly clamoring for attention, and never satisfied.

This is why Jesus responds: "It is written: 'One does not live by bread alone.'" Life means so much more than sensual pleasure. Love, loyalty, relationships, family, moral excellence, aesthetic pleasure, and the aspiration after God are all so much more important. How tragic then when we think that life shrinks down to the contours of pleasure or bodily satisfaction.

Having eaten and drunk more than I should have this last week, I welcome the season of Lent: to go into the desert and reconnect with the One who conquered death, and evil. I welcome the opportunity as Pope Francis puts it, to place myself on the path of Christ, who is "the road that leads to life."

In the desert I will be tempted as Jesus was, but engaging in spiritual combat will teach me to identify evil more readily and to "know how to respond to the attacks of the Evil One."

Pope Francis added: The Lenten desert helps us to say no to worldliness, to the 'idols', it helps us to make courageous choices in accordance with the Gospel and to strengthen solidarity among the brothers.

I found much beauty during my time in Cebu and Bohol, even as I encountered the ugliness of a godless, secular culture that celebrates lust, greed and gluttony.

As I return home, I will bring back with me great memories of natural beauty, friendship, honesty, generosity and hospitality that have enriched me. And I will offer up the ugliness of sin I found on vacation in my Lenten journey forward.

Hopefully, as I travel from beach to desert, I will make this Lent a time of renewal - of my Baptismal covenant and all the commitments that flow from it.*

* To read Pope Francis's full Lenten address, go to: http://www.zenit.org/en/articles/angelus-address-on-crossing-the-lenten-desert?utm_campaign=dailyhtml&utm_medium=email&utm_source=dispatch

Vacation blues

Life is not perfect so why would I expect things to be perfect on vacation for that would be going against the laws of the nature, no? And yet, I do expect perfection, especially because I want it all to be perfect for my mother. Despite this rather unrealistic bent that only serves to increase my stress levels, I am enjoying myself on vacation in beautiful Bohol.

We happened upon live music on our first evening here and enjoyed an evening of song with a delicious fish kinilaw (close cousin to ceviche). The next day we had a slow, lazy day with the opportunity to meet up with friends and spent an afternoon by the beach. Thanks, R, for your warm hospitality. It was a spectacular day.

It has all been really smooth from flying into Cebu (we got upgraded to a suite for our overnight stay which was excellent) and getting into Bohol, and we had a couple of relaxing days. Until yesterday.

We hired a boat to take us to Balicasag island. First, the boatman crammed 12 of us into his tiny craft which I have no issue with for he needs to make a living. What was not cool was he did not show up at the appointed time and despite texting me he was on the way, he still did not appear three hours later, at which point I thought it best to make alternative plans to get back into Panglao.

While it was unpleasant waiting and wondering if the boatman would show up and we didn't order lunch for fear he would show up while we were waiting for our food, we had a scenic view from the restaurant. Although anxiety lessened the pleasure I received from watching the variable weather turn the water from smoky to azure to turquoise and aquamarine and back, I enjoyed my time in Balicasag. The snorkelling was great and the people at the resort were friendly and very helpful.

In times of trouble God sends angels and our angel was the receptionist who helped us get onto a boat that was taking some guests ashore at half the price of a private boat. It was an infinitely more comfortable ride in as we headed for Panglao beach and tthe many gorgeous shades of blue and green the water transformed into minute by minute was a sight to behold.

The other gift was the unique approach into Panglao beach versus our morning launch from Alona beach. The shallowness of the sea meant slow and sometimes manual navigation inland and there was time to fully drink in the beauty that surrounded me.  We finally had to wade through the water to get onto the pier before taking a motor bike ride back to Alona. It was good fun for me (made me miss my diving days) and I think my soon-to-be 82-year-old mother embraced the adventure as well.

My insight from yesterday is when something bad happens, God always has a better way forward. Plus, when I surrender control to Jesus, I am less anxious and more open to the new alternatives constantly opening up. I am also more able to live in the beauty of the present moment rather than fixate on getting the future picture perfect. I need to continue to do more of this and worry less.

As I keep on letting the Spirit lead the rest of our time here, I look forward to more imperfectly perfect days filled with both the good and the bad, and all the blues of sea and sky in between.

Fasting Melakan style

Living in Singapore, I have grown used to the fast pace of city life and the impersonal utilitarianism that pervades this nation of five and a half million people. Every person is a stranger, so do not make eye contact, in case he or she wants something from you and you know full well you have no time to stop and assist, rushing as you are for your next urgent appointment. Better yet, use your phone or tablet as a shield. Plug in your earphones and plug out the world. That way, no one can approach you for you are now invisible in your alternative universe, and everyone else is equally invisible to you. You do not see as your eyes are glued to the screen in front of you.

It was therefore a little disconcerting to note that everywhere I went in Melaka, people noticed me. Walk into a room and all eyes would automatically train on you before glancing off. I initially wondered why people were so inquisitive and even felt their gazes obtrusive. Then I realized it is a small town thing, where everybody pretty much knew everybody else or felt that they did. No one, not even a tourist, is a stranger. I was just used to people ignoring me and seeing through and past me, even those who served me. How sad is that!

What amazed me further was everyone was open to giving assistance without prompting. People were genuinely nice with no thought of return. People here were givers, not users. Even if they were offering a service, they looked at me as a person, not a sale or a number. They were pleasant and they smiled readily. Why can’t Singaporeans be like this? Why can’t we be kaypoh* friendly instead or just kaypoh kiasi kiasu**?

I also noticed that everywhere I went in Melaka, no one was gazing at their phones as they walked or sat in their chairs in coffee shops. Instead they were plugged into life through their eyes and their actions. They were keenly aware of what was going on in their surroundings and actively participated when necessary. They were unafraid to get involved in my life even if it was an inconvenience to them or had no real advantage for them.

Part of this comes from the markedly slower pace of life where people can actually shoot the breeze and enjoy what they are doing. The other reason, I suspect, is people here do not feel compelled to be entertained every waking moment just because technology makes it all possible. They can sit in solitude, watching the world go by, comfortable in their own skins. 

This is just my own observation but I think smart phones and tablets have turned us into not very smart, anti-social, walking zombies. We have replaced old-fashioned conversations, the sharing of lives and quiet moments for our souls to breathe with techno gadgetry, social media and its exhibitionistic, voyeuristic, sterile escapism. This goes counter to the social dimension of our inherent personalities as human beings. Only by interacting with others do we become socially adept and humanistic. Only by giving to others do we actually find ourselves and therefore any form of real, lasting happiness. As Pope Paul VI incisively wrote in Gaudium et Spes, point 24:

For this reason, love for God and neighbor is the first and greatest commandment. Sacred Scripture, however, teaches us that the love of God cannot be separated from love of neighbor: "If there is any other commandment, it is summed up in this saying: Thou shalt love thy neighbor as thyself.... Love therefore is the fulfillment of the Law" (Rom. 13:9-10; cf. 1 John 4:20)…

Indeed, the Lord Jesus, when He prayed to the Father, "that all may be one. . . as we are one" (John 17:21-22) opened up vistas closed to human reason, for He implied a certain likeness between the union of the divine Persons, and the unity of God's sons in truth and charity. This likeness reveals that man, who is the only creature on earth which God willed for itself, cannot fully find himself except through a sincere gift of himself.(2)

If we give in to the lure of technology, isolating ourselves in virtual worlds, we are probably stunting our own growth (in imperceptible but undeniable ways) and transforming ourselves into narcissistic, amoral and immature beings with no social graces. We become unwilling to engage in the real world in meaningful ways. We find reality too alarming, confusing, messy and troublesome, completely forgetting that people, relationships and life are alarming, confusing, messy and troublesome, but also glorious, sublime and definitely worth the effort. We even believe suffering is for others, certainly not us, and we run away from any unpleasantness in our lives instead of facing it head on.

I resolve to be more moderate in my habits and use technology judiciously: stop wexting, stop looking at my phone while having a meal and be more aware of my surroundings like the people I encountered in Melaka. I also intend to create more space to just sit and contemplate Jesus. With Lent just round the corner, fasting can be a life-giving thing as my trip to Melaka has shown me.

* nosy
** afraid to lose out to someone and afraid to get involved for fear of being implicated badly

Surrendering control

If one wants to experience God's loving and very real presence in life, one only has to surrender situations one does not have much control over.

I just got home from a two-day trip to Melaka where I had to run a number of necessary errands in a very limited space of time. Needless to say I was not looking forward to going up prior the trip, even dreaded it.

Before I left, I was already frantically squeezing in pre-trip tasks and had to put up with discouraging comments that left me feeling disheartened. So I prayed a prayer of surrender, placing an itemized wish list before the Lord.

It was an incredible time. I accomplished everything I intended to do, and more. The bonus was the way things just fell into place in a way I could not have planned myself. Even glitches were resolved so easily and quickly that one barely noticed the inconvenience caused.

People were friendly, full of smiles and so willing to help. I really love Melakan folks for they embody the kampong spirit. A good example is when I took a wrong turn and went up a one-way street in the town centre yesterday. Before you say woman driver, it used to be a two-way street and the arrows on the road were not erased, thereby misleading me (there was no No Entry sign I could see either). I even spotted another driver ahead of me who made the same mistake, a man, so I didn't feel so ditzy after all. Whew.

Anyways, we soon realized our mistake when we created a jam. A shopkeeper kindly directed me to pull into his shopfront while he stopped traffic and enabled us two clueless tourist drivers to make a three-point turn and drive down the street the correct way.

Such kindness and the willingness of strangers to lend a helping hand really touched me. Everywhere I went people went out of their way to help without prompting. Simple things like the gift of a few parking coupons when I only asked where I could purchase a book made my day.

The minor miracle of the trip was the ability to find the perfect parking spot in the heart of town where parking spots are a premium. I was waiting to know where to park when the spot behind me magically appeared as a car drove off. And it was right in front of where I needed to be as well. I could not stop being awed and thanking God.

Even the traffic cooperated, as did the queue in the bank. The bank tellers were genuinely nice and intent on saving me money... the list just goes on and on and I was there effectively for one day.

The highlight of this "business" trip was that Mummy and I even had time to meet up with her cousins. It is always nice to see them and spend time with them for every meeting is grace - they are all octogenarians.

When I shared how well things went with my cousin, she simply said: God loves you my dear.

Yes He does! I say this with a hint of surprise and a deeply grateful heart. He even gifted me with things I did not think I had time for such as a dental checkup and the chance to eat satay celup and cendol. Yummers! Yes, I know, talk of food and dental appointments go together so well.

I thank God for all the many things that went right, for the things that went wrong but were, on hindsight, blessings in disguise, and for just loving me so much.

 I will endeavour to invite God to take the driver's seat more often in future for He does a far more superior job than I ever could. No contest.

Slave for love

Today’s second reading from Paul’s first letter to the Corinthians (chapter 9, verse 16) really resonated with me for even though sometimes I feel as if I am a slave to the demands of others and my resentment shows in the impatience of my actions, I know that ultimately there is nothing I desire more than to help spread the Good News to others. If it means making myself a slave, then so be it (this does not imply abject subjugation but rather humility and the ability to be sensitive to the needs of others).

Like Saint Paul, I aspire to become all things to all so that I may help at least a few people experience the Good News in a way I have. His words encourage me to keep going for if I want to claim my share of the Gospel, that is to fully experience the joy of the Gospel myself, then I must live my life in a particular way: lovingly, joyously, empathetically, considerately and, most of all, compassionately. I must not shy away from connecting with others, and in every encounter, I must invite a spirit of hospitality into the interaction so that it becomes a positive experience.

This is quite difficult for me for being task-oriented, I sometimes forget about the journey being so focused on the destination. I get impatient and disconnected easily. I also often forget to rely on God for everything. Of course this is when things always go awry, when I insist on letting my ego take the driver’s seat. Thank God for His graciousness for He always saves the day and ensures I do not do too much damage in my inept and crude ways.

Reflecting on the last four weeks which have been busy beyond belief, there are lessons I can draw from to keep me going in 2015. The first lesson is that love really does conquer all. I have found that when I genuinely love the other (even if I may not agree with or like the person at times), I can do all things in order to touch the other’s heart and show the other how God loves him or her. The only way to love without prejudice and baggage is to keep experiencing God’s love for myself first.

As Pia reiterated in her talk on Christian leadership, being contemplative allows us to see beyond the face of things and to get to the heart of prickly relationships. If I know how to speak and act, especially with difficult people, I can then enable them to glimpse their own true identity. I will be able to bring their inner beauty to surface. Prayer helps me forgive slights imagined or real and to extend a sincere and open hand of friendship in any situation. I can be gentler, wiser and more generous. This is what it is to share God’s presence with others in spite of my own human frailties and shortcomings.

Another lesson that has been relearned recently is to keep saying yes to God even when I am frightened and feel inadequate, so not up to the task. Especially when I know my yes would make a positive difference. Rather than let my fearful and lazy child self stay in the shallows, in agreeing to swim out into deeper waters, I have found strength and empowerment. I grow, more into the person I have been created to be. So while saying yes is not always enjoyable, it is definitely fulfilling and enriching. I will keep saying yes to being a slave for that is my “obligation” as a filial child of God.     

All this running around has meant that I have not been so diligent in looking after my body and getting sufficient sleep. Letting go of the disciplines of physical fitness has resulted in physical exhaustion and a body that creaks and groans like a rusty, old machine. This, I have since discovered, is really bad, for feeling out of sorts physically I am short with people and I have no tolerance for delays or changes to the plan in my head. I am highly irritable and not pleasant to be around. I make errors in judgement. I become scatter-brained. I snap at people then regret it just moments later.

Physical health is thus vital to spiritual health. How can I serve when I am physically not up to it? I am short-changing those I serve for I just cannot give all of myself when my energy levels are close to empty or when some body part is in pain. So I am, more than ever, invested in regaining a supple and ache-free spine.

Thank you Saint Paul for inspiring me to be a slave for love. It is now time for bed for a busy week awaits.

Stories that save lives

The Bible is full of stories. Stories of families that come together that become stories of nations. They are also stories of God, of salvation. Even today this holds true. Stories of my life and yours, our family stories contain stories of God and the seeds of our own salvation, but oftentimes these are obscured, hidden, unless we are alert to them. 

I must therefore create space for these stories, so God can speak in and through them to me first, then I can share fruitfully with others in my life.

Using the story of Mary and Elizabeth, Pia Attard encouraged the women present at the talk in the parish of Saint Teresa last Monday evening how we, as women, can encounter other women and bear spiritual fruit in our lives.

The stories of barrenness in the Bible illustrate the power of God's awesome and saving grace. Only He can orchestrate the impossible. This was so in the story of Elizabeth, an elderly woman past her child-bearing years and Mary, a young virgin. The impossible happened to these two women, fruitfulness hoped for but never dreamed of; fruitfulness that brought great joy, even as it must have brought fear and the pain of sacrifice. 

Drawing on the examples of Elizabeth and Mary, women who went through their fair share of adversity and who in saying yes to God also said yes to uncertainty and loss in their lives, what can we learn from them?

We can learn to trust in God, knowing that our spiritual lives will always imply a lack of control. We can learn that being out of control is not a bad thing for in surrendering control to God, while a scary prospect, can be a liberating one. It can free us for becoming over-anxious and even hopeless when we simply trust God.

As Pia pointed out, Mary is the icon for creating empty space for God. She listened and obeyed. She embraced the revelation of God wholeheartedly even as she must have had many questions and inner struggles within her. She pondered in the sweeping plains of her heart and allowed God to plant a fecund garden brimming with beauty.

If we include this discipline of creating space for God in our lives, we too can conjure space for others and bless them. As contemplatives, we will recognize the hidden presence of God in each other's stories when we come together for we are able to see things essentially. Even when others around us are less than civil and rub us the wrong way, we can still decipher their intrinsic beauty, see beyond the surface of things and treat them with compassion, mustering the necessary patience, wisdom and creativity to draw out their inner beauty. 

Both Mary and Elizabeth had the gift of hospitality. They carried each other in their hearts and prayers, and when they met, they affirmed and edified each other in the life stories they shared with the other. Each woman uncovered the hidden presence of God to the other. We are rarely able to see everything about ourselves and our lives with clarity so we need others to reveal home truths to us, truths that bless us - as Elizabeth did for Mary, and vice versa, I am sure.

From Mary we can also learn how to express gratitude as she did in the Magnificat. The lowliness she shared with Elizabeth was her vulnerability. When we open to each other our imperfections and brokenness, we exercise a mutuality where in giving, we receive, and in receiving, we give.    

Ultimately, when we give ourselves as a gift to others, there in our life stories will God reside, and there will we be saved. Our stories will in turn have the power to save others. As women, we have a gathering, embracing intuition which when we give it full reign with other women, we will become blessed among women and pass this blessedness on, and on. And so it goes. So call your good girlfriend today, share with her your life stories and listen as she shares hers.

Becoming more like John

I have a new role model this year. His name is John the Baptist. Yes, it's that unkempt, ascetic radical who preaches an urgent, unwelcome message to all: Repent for the kingdom of heaven is at hand.

 

He used to make me uncomfortable. Who wears clothes made from camel’s hair and lives on locusts and wild honey? Then walks around telling all and sundry change your ways now or else… What’s up with that?

 

Just because he is supremely uncomfortable in his clothes must he make it disagreeable for me as well? I am a good person, surely I will get to heaven without having to step outside my comfort zone? I do not have to go to the extreme lengths that he did, must I?

 

Although I have certainly travelled far from who I used to be, a woman ensnared in worldly values, what lengths do I go to in order to match John’s love and zeal for God? This is the challenge John the Baptist poses to me every day. Make the change - repent - and change the world.

 

Like Jesus, John must have spent much time in prayer as he knew God’s heart well. Although he was a preacher with an ever-growing following (why else would Herod fear him and eventually have him beheaded), he could humbly say without a trace of irony I am not fit to undo the strap of his sandal and even encouraged his own disciples to follow Jesus.

 

Who on earth, especially today says He must increase, I must decrease? Even when we are working for the same cause, boss, organization, country or kingdom, we all clamour for personal recognition and validation for our efforts. We fear that others might steal our glory, forgetting that everything we do should be for the greater glory of God.

 

We do not allow for diversity of perspectives and we shout down anyone who dares to disagree with us. We use means fair and foul to get what we want even as we simultaneously rationalize our ill motivated decisions and actions, convincing ourselves smugly we are right. It’s funny how we dumb God down thinking we can fool God with clever rhetoric.

 

John never had the problem of ego or hubris for he knew exactly who he was and what his mission on earth was and he worked tirelessly to achieve that end. He was the voice crying out in the wilderness, the frontrunner who prepares the way, the one who baptizes with water not the Holy Spirit, and he lived and worked wholeheartedly for God.

 

If I were him, I would have given up long ago. Why work so hard to play second fiddle? He even recognized Jesus, the younger man and inexperienced preacher (wasn’t he a carpenter for crying out loud), as divine, and accorded Him the requisite respect and worship.

 

Today’s feast day, the Baptism of the Lord, signifies the start of Christ’s public ministry, the revelation of Jesus as God’s beloved son on whom His favour rests, and the descent of the Holy Spirit on Christ in the form of a dove. It reminds me that, likewise, I have been baptized in the Holy Spirit and I am God’s beloved child.  

 

As Father Arro raised in his homily this morning life will always present struggles and difficulties, but I can walk in confidence, hope and joy knowing that the marvellous gift of my baptism has won me the favour of God’s forever love.

 

May I become more like John the Baptist for if I allow Jesus to increase and I decrease, then I will not be tempted to seek my own kingdom but God’s, and I will be content with zero accolades and no external validation. Just as long as I bring God pleasure with silent yet far-reaching humility.