Fatima reveals

When one goes to a Marian shrine like Fatima in Portugal, there are expectations, especially when the day of the visit falls on 13 September, the date of the penultimate apparition of Mother Mary to young Lucia, Francisco and Jacinta in 1917.

I wasn't disappinted. Despite my initial dismay and stress induced by the brevity of the visit, I was given hard but clear insight as to what a pilgrimage is really meant for - a conversion of heart.

What did I really want to get out of going to Fatima? The answer was crystalline: peace and harmony that comes from the ability to love and forgive, as suggested by our driver cum guide, John, before we got there.

When I knew what I wanted, it was easy to know where to go, in spite of my initial confusion. The way forward was to jettison all negative emotion and to be led by the Spirit. I could hear Mother Mary encourage me: Follow him. So together with P by my side, we went forward to receive Jesus in the Eucharist as we became one with the pilgrims who were attending mass in the main square.

Before we left, some insights that came to me were that the love of Christ is always attainable, even when I am distracted and not quite feeling it. Conversion requires nothing more than the sincere desire to follow Christ, and then for me to make good that desire in action. Not an easy thing to accomplish most times, but doable mainly because His grace is always available to those who want it.

Jesus is always there for me, and with me, and He wants to bless me, but in order to be blessed, I have to receive Him with a repentant heart, a heart fully aware of my own sinfulness, but humble enough to rely wholly on Him to help me change, and thus to be able to refine my thoughts, words and actions continually.

The message given to the children that September in 1917 remains fresh:

You must pray! Continue to pray the Rosary every day in order to obtain the end of the war.

Praying unceasingly is the only way we can end the wars waged not just externally, but especially those we each wage internally. Unless I win those skirmishes with my inner demons that breed fear, resentment and discord, I cannot be His ambassador of peace, nor His face of love.

Our Lady of Fatima pray for us who believe, who adore, who hope, and who love God, and who ask pardon for those who do not believe, do not adore, do not hope and do not love.