Spirit led

"The wind blows where it pleases and you hear its sound,
but you don't know where it comes from or where it is going.
It is like that with everyone who is born of the Spirit."

The lyricism and power of this verse from John's gospel blows my mind every time I read it.

While it reminds me to desist from attempting to grasp too tightly the mystery and transcendence of the Creator for He is beyond all human understanding, it also reminds me that Christ is immanent, residing right within me.

He is my spirit guide, the inner voice that lights my path with velvet-soft whispers. In order to proceed along the narrow path of God's will, I must use my sensibilities intuitively, relying on a blend of compassion and righteousness that is indubitably Christ's.

It is never easy to navigate based on faith for it can be such a fragile and nebulous thing. Plus being human (and a kiasu Singaporean), I tend to hedge my bets on known facts and figures, and what my head tells me.

I still remember asking E. in Bangalore how will I know if I am following what God wills in my life or simply following my own will? She told me to ask that He speaks to me in ways that I understand. And then to sit back and listen carefully in my sacred spaces of prayer time.

It's amazing what can come from a sincere desire to decipher the movements of the Spirit. While it will never be an exact science, there are instances I know that an unexplainable impulse is Spirit led. This is especially so when I consider the consequences of that said impulse. If it moves me to bear good fruit, beneficial to those around me, then it is as it should be. As He wills it.

Of course there are times I wonder if a decision or idea comes from Him or from me? In those instances, I seek counsel from people whom I trust for their sound judgment. I also read the lay of the land, gathering information from various sources, bringing it to prayer, then seeing where my heart leads me. Consolation or desolation?*

Along the way I've learned not to let fear of making the wrong decision stop me from acting. For even a wrong decision can be made right if my initial and constant desire is to follow His will. The creativity of the Spirit never ceases to surprise me so I am no longer afraid to mess up or go with the flow.

As we honour the 'Advocate' given to us on Pentecost, I give thanks for this great gift of the Holy Spirit and resolve to remain open to living in the Spirit.


* Making use of tools or methodologies of brilliant minds who have trodden the same path before me is of great assistance. I am currently enjoying the revisit of Ignatian spirituality, made easy by Margaret Silf in her book Landmarks.