As the Extraordinary Year of Mercy draws to an end soon, I look at my take aways: how has the year been for me, have I stretched enough to make a difference, and what should I continue to do beyond this year?
My Year began with reverse carolling in Mindoro last December and it was a good way to realize that everything I have comes from God, and to share what I have, as generously as possible, with those who have little or none. Although it may seem impossible to cure the world's ills, I cannot stop trying for Isaiah 61 is a mandate for daily living if I truly believe in Christ.
I am inspired by Father Caloy Paglicawan, who is a force of nature in his world, a force that has brought hope, faith and joy, the light of Christ into the darkness of poverty. He, and many others like him, are workers in the vineyard who make a difference in the lives of those around them. They choose to be a part of His people, and so do I.
Wherever God chooses to situate me, I will go. Sometimes this involves hard choices, and I cannot say I set out wholeheartedly (feeling inadequate, weary, and a little crazy come to mind), or whether I heed all the cries I hear, but I can only try sincerely. Simply to say yes and go, and let Him do the rest. This has become increasingly clear these past months for the way ahead will be characterized by tremendous change, something that requires from me much deeper reserves of faith, and more mercy all around.
In all his messages, the Pope usually encourages us to go beyond the letter of the law, especially on the topic of mercy. We first need to understand the law, but more than that, we need to inscribe it on our hearts, internalized it such that we are not fixated on executing it just so, or spend our time arguing minor points to prove we know it best, but to live it out fully in thoughts, words and deeds, quietly and humbly. The law is but a guide to confirm our actions when we are in doubt.
Lest we forget, love of God and others is what we should be shooting for, and in order to do this, we need humility, compassion, courage, patience, and an unwavering orientation towards forgiveness. B calls this my jubilee year and she is right for I have experienced reconciliation in a few key relationships that have gone sour for years where all I could do previously was to maintain as much a loving and forgiving attitude as possible. It has been arduous but with prayer as my modus operandi, I have managed to maintain my equilibrium and self-worth in order to do the right thing, knowing all the time that I could always do better, that is, be more loving and forgiving.
Striving for the spirit of the law has now become my preferred choice over a more legalistic way of doing things as it gives me more joy and inner peace. I do not waste my time figuring out if I have performed sufficiently but assume that I should go the distance as long as I do not cause harm to myself. And as the parable of the dutiful servant (Luke 17:7-10) reminds me, what I do is not particularly noteworthy for I am merely doing what I ought to do. No self appointed sainthood in the offing even as I take pleasure in being good and doing good, and making my Father smile.
The loss of J, the meeting of P, the illness of E, and then C, all the emotional ups and downs have made for a year where I often wished I did not love so much. And yet, life is all about love; as the hymn goes, to live is to love with all your heart. Love is my ethos so I am just going to go for it, despite the expected scrapes and bruises I will receive along the way. I will not fear the bad that comes with the good, but will celebrate both with appropriate equanimity. Many good things come out of the bad as history usually proves anyway.
A recurring lesson for me these past months is to hold everything lightly in my hands, whether it be joy, grief, peace, despair, anger, fear, bitterness, pride or satisfaction. This infers thanking the Lord in all situations, and the ability to be grateful - it has certainly helped me keep things on a more even keel, even in the massive tsunamis of disaster and loss.
Being good does not mean not having fun - goodness and pleasure are not mutually exclusive. I do tend to err on the side of serious and intense, demanding perfection of myself in whatever I do, becoming Martha-like self-righteous and querulous at times. So meeting P has been good for my soul for he makes me laugh and reminds me that keeping a sanguine frame of mind helps me be more tolerant and patient. I am learning not to take myself too seriously: to hold life loosely in my palms, and to walk lightly with an unburdened and listening heart.
Perhaps Saint Vincent de Paul says it best: If humble souls are contradicted, they remain calm; if they are calumniated, they suffer with patience; if they are little esteemed, neglected, or forgotten, they consider that their due; if they are weighed down with occupations, they perform them cheerfully.
Mercy will never go out of fashion. So I would like to continue walking in Christ's footsteps and help the poor, imprisoned and broken-hearted be restored to wholeness and liberation. In order to do this, I need to ensure that I, myself, am not impoverished, enslaved, or in despair. E told me recently that Isaiah 62 is mine this season. I will take that, the Father's loving vindication and salvation, and I look forward to my future - delight, marriage, holiness, to be sought after and not forgotten - just more of His mercy in my life, both on the receiving end, and in the giving.
My Year began with reverse carolling in Mindoro last December and it was a good way to realize that everything I have comes from God, and to share what I have, as generously as possible, with those who have little or none. Although it may seem impossible to cure the world's ills, I cannot stop trying for Isaiah 61 is a mandate for daily living if I truly believe in Christ.
I am inspired by Father Caloy Paglicawan, who is a force of nature in his world, a force that has brought hope, faith and joy, the light of Christ into the darkness of poverty. He, and many others like him, are workers in the vineyard who make a difference in the lives of those around them. They choose to be a part of His people, and so do I.
Wherever God chooses to situate me, I will go. Sometimes this involves hard choices, and I cannot say I set out wholeheartedly (feeling inadequate, weary, and a little crazy come to mind), or whether I heed all the cries I hear, but I can only try sincerely. Simply to say yes and go, and let Him do the rest. This has become increasingly clear these past months for the way ahead will be characterized by tremendous change, something that requires from me much deeper reserves of faith, and more mercy all around.
In all his messages, the Pope usually encourages us to go beyond the letter of the law, especially on the topic of mercy. We first need to understand the law, but more than that, we need to inscribe it on our hearts, internalized it such that we are not fixated on executing it just so, or spend our time arguing minor points to prove we know it best, but to live it out fully in thoughts, words and deeds, quietly and humbly. The law is but a guide to confirm our actions when we are in doubt.
Lest we forget, love of God and others is what we should be shooting for, and in order to do this, we need humility, compassion, courage, patience, and an unwavering orientation towards forgiveness. B calls this my jubilee year and she is right for I have experienced reconciliation in a few key relationships that have gone sour for years where all I could do previously was to maintain as much a loving and forgiving attitude as possible. It has been arduous but with prayer as my modus operandi, I have managed to maintain my equilibrium and self-worth in order to do the right thing, knowing all the time that I could always do better, that is, be more loving and forgiving.
Striving for the spirit of the law has now become my preferred choice over a more legalistic way of doing things as it gives me more joy and inner peace. I do not waste my time figuring out if I have performed sufficiently but assume that I should go the distance as long as I do not cause harm to myself. And as the parable of the dutiful servant (Luke 17:7-10) reminds me, what I do is not particularly noteworthy for I am merely doing what I ought to do. No self appointed sainthood in the offing even as I take pleasure in being good and doing good, and making my Father smile.
The loss of J, the meeting of P, the illness of E, and then C, all the emotional ups and downs have made for a year where I often wished I did not love so much. And yet, life is all about love; as the hymn goes, to live is to love with all your heart. Love is my ethos so I am just going to go for it, despite the expected scrapes and bruises I will receive along the way. I will not fear the bad that comes with the good, but will celebrate both with appropriate equanimity. Many good things come out of the bad as history usually proves anyway.
A recurring lesson for me these past months is to hold everything lightly in my hands, whether it be joy, grief, peace, despair, anger, fear, bitterness, pride or satisfaction. This infers thanking the Lord in all situations, and the ability to be grateful - it has certainly helped me keep things on a more even keel, even in the massive tsunamis of disaster and loss.
Being good does not mean not having fun - goodness and pleasure are not mutually exclusive. I do tend to err on the side of serious and intense, demanding perfection of myself in whatever I do, becoming Martha-like self-righteous and querulous at times. So meeting P has been good for my soul for he makes me laugh and reminds me that keeping a sanguine frame of mind helps me be more tolerant and patient. I am learning not to take myself too seriously: to hold life loosely in my palms, and to walk lightly with an unburdened and listening heart.
Perhaps Saint Vincent de Paul says it best: If humble souls are contradicted, they remain calm; if they are calumniated, they suffer with patience; if they are little esteemed, neglected, or forgotten, they consider that their due; if they are weighed down with occupations, they perform them cheerfully.
Mercy will never go out of fashion. So I would like to continue walking in Christ's footsteps and help the poor, imprisoned and broken-hearted be restored to wholeness and liberation. In order to do this, I need to ensure that I, myself, am not impoverished, enslaved, or in despair. E told me recently that Isaiah 62 is mine this season. I will take that, the Father's loving vindication and salvation, and I look forward to my future - delight, marriage, holiness, to be sought after and not forgotten - just more of His mercy in my life, both on the receiving end, and in the giving.
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