It speaks to me right at the place I am now - trying to figure out how to live out my singlehood in a manner befitting a woman of active, lively faith. (BTW, it’s a fantastic book and definitely worth a read. Or two.)
Rolheiser talks about loneliness - why we feel lonely, why it's OK to feel lonely, and what are the consequences, pitfalls and benefits of loneliness. He offers the wisdom of some of the Church's greatest theologians as well as his own practical tips on how we can channel loneliness.
While loneliness is something each of us will experience at different points in our life (no one is exempt), if we acknowledge its presence and deal with in a constructive manner, loneliness can yield very rich and positive results.
Creating works of art that bring pleasure to the masses. Going outside of self and ministering to others like Mother Teresa did. Helping others get through life’s dry spells with a shower of empathy and compassion sourced from the depths of loneliness.
So what causes the L word? I love this definition found in the book:
"Perhaps the old myths and legends capture it best when they say that, before being born, each soul is kissed by God and then goes through life always, in some dark way, remembering that kiss and measuring everything it experiences in relation to that original sweetness." (p.54)
St. Augustine describes this primordial kiss as a God-shaped space within the heart that can only be filled by God. And this space is what keeps us always seeking, thirsting for God.
“…for you have made us for yourself and our heart is restless until it rests in you.”
Having travelled the pleasure route indulging and satiating the senses, having participated in an alphabet of activities before I stood still and went within to seek Him, I have to agree with St. Augustine – the dude was spot on.
Looking for love in all the wrong places left me feeling more alienated, needy and seriously out of whack emotionally - until I turned to Him to fill the God-shaped space within my heart. And I continue to do so, time and again.
By inviting God to enter the space within my heart, I allow His presence in my life to bring healing and so much love that in my aloneness, I am in communion with Him and more connected than in a roomful of people “talking without speaking”.
Rolheiser invites us into a spirituality of loneliness; to constantly move towards a creative rather than destructive force within our lives.
Simple actions are called for such as (overcoming our fears) and taking emotional risks in relationships, being vulnerable and honest without forgetting to be playful and creative in loving others, and giving enough space for relationships to breathe and grow.
While this also involves commitment and self-sacrifice, the ability to find peace and an oft times blissful solitude is worthwhile.
So instead of trying to fill the emptiness with booze, drugs, sex or some other man-ufactured diversion, try a little God-filled solitude next time you’re lonely.
It’s free, safe and oh so soul-satisfying. With no morning-after regrets.
No comments:
Post a Comment