Mastering pain

Last night's episode of Grey's Anatomy featured a little girl who thought she was super-human for she could take a beating and not feel any pain.

"Punch me in the stomach," she would encourage people to whom she wanted to prove her powers.

It turned out that she had a disorder where she couldn't feel pain and had been punched in the stomach once too often for she was suffering from internal bleeding and needed an operation urgently to save her life.

From the plethora of pain killers on the market, the huge numbers of people on emotion-numbing drugs like Prozac to the culture of drugs and alcohol that have bred rampant addiction, pain is something we avoid at all costs, it would seem.

Most times, pain is the body's way of signalling something is wrong. That inner voice that tells us to “Stop. Slow down. Figure out what’s wrong and make a change,” is a form of self-protection.

Unfortunately the usual reaction today is “Make it go away now!” and the quick fix solution is usually one that treats the symptoms while ignoring the source.

Fixing the source of pain sometimes requires more pain and is usually a lengthy process that requires much effort. It’s just too much bother so most people opt for the quick fix and ignore the warning.

C.S. Lewis said: "God whispers to us in our pleasures, speaks in our conscience, but shouts in our pains: it is His megaphone to rouse a deaf world."

Pain has a purpose, a good one at that.

Christ Himself was not impervious to pain. When He prayed alone in the garden of Gethsemane, in His anguish, His sweat became “great drops of blood”.

He even asked His Father to remove the cup of suffering if it were the Father’s will. It was not to be removed.

However, God never leaves us to deal with pain alone. He responded to the fidelity of His son: “Then an angel from heaven appeared to him and gave him strength.” (Luke 22:43)

So if we embrace what the Lord wills in our lives, even the pain, He will supply the necessary resources to endure and to persevere, facilitating the healing and growth process.

Remaining faithful beyond reason or worldly wisdom will eventually bring us to a place of peace and inner strength.

When I experienced the loss of a relationship that meant the world to me at the time, I joked with close friends that the worst part of the pain was that I couldn’t even misbehave to seek solace or relief from the pain for I had chosen to follow Christ.

Underneath the knee-jerk reaction to embark on a destructive search for a palliative - go out and find a man, any man to validate my womanhood - I appreciated the strength I was given to work through the pain of rejection and loss in a healthy manner.

He answered my prayers by sending me angels in the form of various people who made me feel loved and I was protected from the impulses of a pain-crazed mind that would have led me to give in to neon-bright temptations and caused irreparable collateral damage.

In the time needed to walk through the fire, I gained many blessings: wisdom, resilience of spirit, great reserves of inner strength, my self-respect and a buoyant self-worth, a quiet confidence and a greater depth of compassion and empathy.

I slayed my personal demons and emerged liberated, to go forth into the sunshine again.

While I do not wish to experience such depths of pain again, I do not run away from relationships that may trigger pain of such gargantuan proportions. I continue to love life.

And I continue to be awed by His boundless love for me, a love that soothes all pain.