Power breakfast with Jesus

During my cell group meeting last Tuesday, we did lectio divina on today’s gospel from John 21:1-19. It is the one where Peter goes back to his old trade, fishing, and the beloved disciple, along with five other disciples are in the boat with Peter. They catch nothing the whole night, until someone from the shore suggests they put out over the starboard side. The beloved disciple then recognizes it is Jesus who is on the shore and tells Peter. The near-naked Peter dons his cloak and dives into the water swimming towards Jesus while the rest keep busy hauling in their huge catch of 153 fish before making for the shore. Jesus invites them to a breakfast he has prepared of charcoal grilled fish and bread, and he also asks them to bring some of their catch to cook over the flames. He serves them the bread and cooked fish.

Here is where Jesus also redeems Peter’s previously cowardly behaviour and re-instates him by asking him if he loves Him three times, then asking him to feed and tend to His lambs and sheep. He also offers Peter a prophetic message on how he will be led by the belt to go where he does not want to go, to a death glorifying God with his life. 

This passage holds many powerful messages for me. The prophetic message for Peter is certainly applicable for anyone who seeks to follow Christ to the very end. There will be times, and a lot of times, when you don’t want to go down a road to certain death, but you know you must.  Having a clear sense of direction doesn’t mean I don’t grapple with dying to self. There are days the tasks are endless, exhausting and thankless. I really wish to take a break and escape for my body is really protesting at the stress I’ve put it under, yet knowing that’s not quite possible, so I really relate to Peter’s future circumstances.

At the same time  I do really want to tend His lambs, His flock, and I find great pleasure and fulfilment in caring and nurturing others. So what’s the solution? Power breakfast with Jesus. I was reminded that Jesus Himself prepares a hearty and delicious breakfast for me when I decide to go to Him, sit and eat with Him. So why am I not giving us that necessary time, more so when I am feeling stretched to the point of breaking? Silly, really. 

This passage also recounts the third instance after the resurrection the Lord appears to His disciples just when they are disheartened and have lost direction. In this case, like in the road to Emmaus, He gives them time to recognize His resurrected appearance, and to decide whether they wish to accept His invitation to break bread with Him, to eat with Him, and enjoy His company. 

The transformation is marked when we decide to sit at the table with Him like the disciples, for we allow ourselves to be fed, nourished, refreshed and renewed in mind, body and spirit. We are given new heart to carry on. In this passage, the Lord waits patiently for Peter to come to Him, ready to be forgiven for his previous betrayals, and Jesus gives His forgiveness readily, making Peter the shepherd of His flock. There are no reprimands or I told you sos.

I know that Jesus is with me, journeying with me every step of the way, and when I need to be nourished, I have an open invitation to dine with Him, which I can take Him up on daily, through prayer and the Eucharistic celebration. I may not always feel delight and appreciation, given my own preoccupations at any given point in time, but the epiphany for me is that I can always look forward in hope. Even in despair I know I can look to Him, and in that mustard seed moment of faith I know I will be alright because He is there. He has already seen me through much more difficult times in my life, why would He not do so now?

Like Peter, I can give myself permission to experience guilt, sorrow, fear, regret, anger, hurt, bitterness, pettiness and the whole gamut of negative emotions but as long as I accept the invitation to breakfast with Him, I will eventually work my way through the mire of my own failures, betrayals and sins. With faith and hope, I can go through the process of much-needed purification and I can arrive at a place of peace, peace with myself and with the world. I can emerge a peace-maker, saying to Jesus: Yes, Lord, I love you, and I will feed and tend Your flock with great care. 

Through a second lectio divina of the same Scriptural passage yesterday afternoon I was able to appreciate and experience gratitude at the abundance He has blessed me with today. I am humbled that I took so much for granted and even carped at things that did not quite meet my expectations. My critical eyes saw the one-hundredth empty cup. I also saw that I needed to work on trusting Him more rather than using my human reasoning, worrying intellectually over logistics or limitations and becoming a nay-sayer consequently. 

The point is despite there being so many fish, the net didn’t break. So I need to walk more in faith, trusting Him rather than doubting like Thomas, just because I did not put my hand in His side. I need to suspend judgement and belief, and do whatever He tells me to without argument or protest. Quiet obedience with no inner defeatist self-talk. In that way, more will come to believe in Him because they are able to witness the miraculous strength of the net, and I don’t drive myself crazy stressing needlessly.

So today I bring the humble offering of fish I have caught, thanks to His fishing advice, and I accept his invitation to breakfast. Hope to see you there.