So I thought I better start thinking of what I would say as I will be giving my point of view as a single woman.
Whether single, married or in-between (as E. put it today), we all want to be happy, we all want to be loved and we want to be cherished and fulfilled by love.
Seeing as both men and women are created for "marriage", to be perfect foils, bringing out the best in each other by being in a unifying and giving relationship, how can singles, single parents, those who are unhappily married and those who separated or divorced, how can we all achieve a level of fulfillment that is purportedly reserved for happily married people?
I discovered in 2003 I was created for marriage and motherhood. So what did this mean for me, who was neither married nor a mother, and seven years on is still neither?
The epiphany was an invitation from Jesus, to allow him to be my spouse, the man who could give me everything I desired for it was He who put my passions, my desires within me, especially this vocation of marriage and motherhood.
In accepting the unusual invitation - if building a living and intimate relationship with someone who does not have a corporeal presence in today's world of fleshly desires is not unusual, I do not know what is - I have gained the ideal husband and lover i.e. if I keep saying yes to the invitation.
Saying yes is not easy. Neither does it get easier.
I have had to trust with an open heart and singular faith, sailing roiling, uncharted waters I would never have ventured if not for Him.
Fidelity, the uncompromising badge of spousal love, is a full-time commitment even when I don't feel like it, even when I am afraid, uncertain and in darkest despair.
Plus life is hardly hunky dory all the time. There is conflict, trouble, violence, betrayal, sickness, death, tragedy, loss, hurt, abuse, and loneliness.
I sometimes question if it's all worthwhile even when I know, deep in my heart, that it is.
So why do I keep saying yes?
My answer hinges on last Sunday's gospel from Luke: the sinful woman with the jar of alabaster, who enters the room where Jesus is and stands behind Him weeping, then proceeds to wipe her tears from off His feet with her hair and to anoint His feet with kisses and costly ointment from her jar.
Like her, I am a sinner with a less than pristine past. Like her, I am the debtor with the bigger debt to be forgiven and therefore I am the one who "loves more" because I am "forgiven" much.
While I do not advocate the practice of self-flagellation, self-awareness through self-examination is necessary for spiritual and emotional growth and for a healthy conscience to keep operating at optimum levels.
In being able to articulate my sins and to believe I can be forgiven my sins, I am given the peace of redemptive absolution and an ever-growing capacity for love - both to receive and to give.
Thus I am able to live out the fullest expression of my sexuality as woman through this amazing spousal relationship I have with Jesus.I am loved and cherished as a spouse and mother, and I can love as a spouse and mother. In this ongoing exchange of love, I am fulfilled, as only a happily married woman can be.
All I have to do is say yes, and keep on doing so.
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