Roman holiday

After Malta, I effectively spent four days in Rome with three full days of sightseeing. As I had never been to Rome I was excited and much looking forward to it. I was not disappointed. The churches were incredibly beautiful and the saints were thrillingly inspiring. The cherry on the cake would've been to attend a Wednesday audience with Pope Francis but he was busy wowing Cuba and America. Such is life.

A took such good care of us (I had a different beer to try every night) and we were so blessed by God's generosity that I had the most amazing, albeit exhausting, vacation.

So what is God saying to me in this Roman holiday (E's favourite question)? There are a couple of things, chief among which is He is truly my soul and sole provider, no one else could love me as unconditionally and generously.

I have awesome sisters in community, sisters who are a joy to hang out with, and who inspire me with their deep and radical love for Jesus. The fellowship has been delightful, thank you, A and A, and thank you Father Francis for making Assisi so special, a mini pilgrimage of sorts.

Life will not be without its sacrifices, struggles and tragedies (as evidenced through the lives of countless saints), and yet, it can be achingly beautiful, joyously sacred and  overwhelmingly good. So I just have to keep leaning on Him and His grace.

It was short, intense and just perfect.
Sunny skies with a touch of rain
Roma rich coffee and luscious gelatos.
We traipsed all over the city, Ams and I
Oohing and aahing at the glorious architecture
Of basilicas, catacombs and the Vatican...
The saints were our best friends
Whom we visited with eagerness:
Saints Peter and Paul, Catherine, Sebastian
and John Paul II, please pray for us!
Not forgetting Clare and Francis in Assisi.
The wood of the manger, the nails of the cross,
Holy steps, Spanish steps, the footprints of Christ,
Quo vadis Domine?
There was the Pantheon, the Coliseum, the Trevi
A race by the Circus Maximus before we got lost
In the beauty of the Trinity on the hill,
Plus all three levels of Santa Maria Maggiore.
We gatecrashed mass in Saint John Lateran
Saluted the empty balcony in Saint Peter's Square
Took a selfie with the Holy Door ahead of time
We ate, prayed, and had a lovely time,
Filled with laughter and l'amore di Dio
What was the highlight, friends want to know?
It was the silent, still pauses in between.

Lessons in Malta

C once said to me I do not ask for gifts from God because I am afraid of getting them, then I have to use them. I thought she was nuts until my recent trip to Malta where together with about 120 others I celebrated Institute for World Evangelisation ICPE Mission's 30th anniversary.

It was an anointed time, so blessed, meeting old friends, making new ones. I was enriched by the testimonies and teachings of so many that it will take me some time to digest everything properly. Having been given so many gifts, I am now called to embody the shared wisdom. I must deal with challenging situations I am faced with upon my return with a new level of maturity. Must I? Really? I can see now why C didn't want spiritual gifts from God.

Putting aside my facetiousness, I thank and praise God for giving me the tools to be a better missionary disciple, to be a better person really. What does this mean?

For me, it is to walk with conviction and joy, praising Him and giving Him glory even in bad times and impossible situations. It is the personal choice to trust and lean on Jesus (thank you Father Martin) so that I can perceive reality with more clarity, and not just through the fractured lens of my brokenness. It is the ability to receive healing and acquire true vision, and a heart that is totally for God; through Him, with Him and in Him, in unity with the Holy Spirit.

I am inspired to become more prophetic and to say yes wholeheartedly to Jesus when he tells me I can change the world through you if you are willing not to take the credit (thank you Bruce Clewett).

I am reminded that in a world filled with darkness I need to be an icon of patience, hope, humility and joy in order to usher everyone through the door of faith into the life of God (thank you Father Geno).

I must not forget to bring the oil of gladness to others, clothed in my mantle of praise (thank you Archbishop Scicluna) and to exalt Father God always, who, in turn, will exalt me as He exalted His Son who died on the cross to exalt Him (thank you Cardinal Turkson).

To follow Christ involves carrying the cross as He did, and even being crucified on it as He was, so this reflection by Father Frank is one I take to heart closely:

*  We will always be tempted to avoid carrying the cross, so we must stay sensitive to the movement of the Holy Spirit to recognize temptation when we see it, and work against it.

*  We can never be certain of what the future holds, only hindsight offers 20/20 vision, so it's vital to keep moving ahead on faith, persevering even when circumstances are bleak and hopeless.

*  It is necessary to carry our own brother or sister in ministry. As good as we are in ministering to others, we must do the same for those in our communities and families. It is hardest to love those nearest to us, who can be constant thorns in our sides, and who show up our weaknesses and flaws all too easily, but they help sanctify us the most. The seeds of mercy, forgiveness and generosity reside within these relationships.

*  With the cross there is always resurrection, that is its beauty. It is the promise of redemption fulfilled by Jesus dying on the cross. So no matter how torturous our crosses may be, we can cling to them with love and hope for what will follow will be far greater.

Thank you, Anna and Mario Capello, for giving us the ICPE Mission DNA of worship and evangelization. Thank you both for your faithful journey from inception till now, and beyond. May God bless you both and the ICPE Mission as we all work as one, united community to bring glory to God, our Father.

Becoming a missionary disciple

It was an old, wooden cross 
worn with age, dusty, chipped in places
no longer appealing in its weatherbeaten facade.
One day there was a loud crack 
as a deep crevice ran down its face 
exposing a grievous wound.
It's broken now, quite useless,
fit to be thrown into the bonfire
thought the priest - it cannot be salvaged.
But heeding an inner whisper
he called the craftsman in to see
With his UV light, the master came,
poring over carefully the body he saw otherwise
such ancient beauty wrought by prayerful hands
There was gold beneath, artful and precious
it was magnificent, a breathing masterpiece
suffocated through years of callous living
waiting quiescently to be restored
to sing out once again the joy the creator felt 
as he glorified God by answering his call. 
Deep calls unto deep so dive into the deep
the Spirit invites us to see beneath 
the impression of every encounter
the mask of every person to discover the gold
the priceless image of God that lays hidden
under the thick patina of lies and worldly distortions.
Lech-Lecha, God's call to Abraham was this:
Go, leave the place you are now residing
Go within, and journey toward yourself
Go for you!
Unless you do, you will remain forever stuck
a missionary, an NGO, who journeys long and hard
bowed under the weight of stone baggage 
but who never arrives at your desired destination
unable to truthfully praise and thank God 
no authority, no authenticity, in your actions
just rigid and controlling meanness
a priest or prophet with spiritual bad breath 
a shallow soul without nobility
There can be no ministry without contemplation
you cannot know the Lord's heart
His desires for you without wiping 
bitter tears off His feet, breaking 
the jar of past hurts and disappointments,
and anointing His feet with the perfume 
of your miserable, worthless past
allowing Him to wipe your tears,
heal the wounds with His mercy and love
He will go with you where He calls you
if you let go of your life and let Him restore you
breathe new life into your being
Glorifying you as you glorify Him.
The journey is long, the journey is hard,
it is also impossibly beautiful, and good,
a joy to behold: for you, for others, and for God
Lech-Lecha!

NB Thank you Father Martin Cilia for sharing how we as missionary disciples should live the inner journeys and outer pathways of our lives.

Holy indifference

Holy indifference, the preacher said,
First and foremost is to be
in right relationship with God
To know who you are in the world
who and what you stand for
even when facing the guillotine
you stand fast, upright and unafraid
singing Salve Regina with your last breath
as the blade descends on skin and bone
Holy indifference is a love that bleeds
a heart on fire for God, the Almighty
moving, living and being only for the Lord
die, die, must follow Jesus!
you shed tears, copious and unceasing,
allowing yourself to be crucified
especially by your nearest and dearest
people you draw into your heart
just as Jesus drew you into His
Holy indifference is to live as a witness
joyous even in the hurricane
waiting out the storm patiently
dead certain that Jesus is in the boat with you
you steer with hope-filled tenacity
eyes and heart wide open to His Word
holding tight to His outstretched hand
humbly deferring to holy direction
going wherever you are led, in Spirit
Holy indifference is to be a missionary disciple
to do as Jesus did, every day
living an ordinary life that
speaks of God's extraordinary promise
in every human encounter
it won't  be easy, it will be uncomfortable
yours will be a voice lost in the wilderness
but as you lose your life you will know
Eternal life is yours, today and every day

With thanks to Father Geno Sylva for inspiring us at ICPE Mission's 30th anniversary celebration in Malta.