Baby talk = Spirit speak

Happiness is having a child lay his face upon your chest for comfort, in complete trust, wholly at ease. This was my baby fix for the day, along with the incomprehensible but utterly delightful conversation I had with my 14-month-old charge, Ian. I have been babysitting the last three Saturdays after a busy morning of teaching and it’s been refreshing, albeit tiring. It has also been a great way to spend time with some of my community sisters with whom I shared baby-sitting duties.

I am quite thankful now that I am not a mother for it is such a huge responsibility and I no longer have the required energy, although I know I would have made an excellent one (a tad psychotic at times but wonderful nonetheless), and I feel very blessed that I have been given many opportunities in life to play at being one. From youngest brother, to young cousins, to cousin’s kids, to godchildren, and now, my community’s kiddies, I have enjoyed every moment of changing nappies, feeding, burping, entertaining and just watching them grow.

I never thought I would end up single without children but it no longer is the tragedy it was for in giving Jesus carte blanche with my life, I have managed to live out my vocation. I was created for marriage and motherhood and being a childless, single woman has not cramped my style at all. These last 12 years (since I articulated my vocation) have been unconventional but fulfilling, and have brought me many indelibly happy moments.

At today’s confirmation mass in Saint Teresa’s, Archbishop Goh spoke about the importance of finding meaning in life which comes mostly from serving others, as Jesus did. His other takeaway messages were the necessity of having a personal experience of God in order to be able to witness authentically and with conviction, and the beauty of Pentecost which is the powerful renewal of the Spirit that was gifted to us in baptism.

The Holy Spirit is our panacea to the sorry state of the world we find ourselves in currently for it is the Spirit of God that can renew the face of the earth, transforming hearts and lives. The Spirit within us is what animates and enriches our beings, steering us to lead extraordinary lives filled with mundane, tedious, day-to-day tasks.

Pentecost is a reminder to all Christians that living in the Spirit is the only way to true happiness for when we are guided by Him in all things, then we will somehow be living the dream, the dream that was placed in our hearts even before we were born.

Service does require commitment and sacrifice, but if we enter into service with intent, grasping the meaning of what we do, even the most mind-numbingly thankless chore can be elevated into something with the touch of the divine. Those who serve will gain more than those who are being served. Those who serve will be blessed beyond measure.

I can testify to this for baby Ian gave me a priceless gift today. Thank you, C and S, for entrusting your child to me. Ian gave me a personal encounter with God, God who said I love and trust you completely. Won’t you love and trust me completely, too?    

The Luke 4:18 difference

Two events have gripped the world in recent weeks. One is the devastating April 25 earthquake in Nepal with a subsequent and equally damaging May 12 one which killed thousands and left hundreds of thousands injured and homeless.

The other is boat loads of persecuted Rohingya, a Muslim minority in Myanmar, who seek asylum in Thailand, Indonesia and Malaysia to no avail. Stuck at sea with Bangladeshi migrants, they are collectively rejected landing rights anywhere, and thousands have perished at sea, dying sometimes violent, but mostly torturous deaths from thirst and starvation.

While the world has been united in bringing aid to the Nepalese, the boat people have become a hot potato that no one wants to handle. Both situations are heart-wrenching but the one that truly outrages my sensibilities is the plight of the Rohingya refugees.

Oppressed pariahs in their homeland, this ethnic minority are not recognized as citizens with rights due to their alternative religious beliefs in a predominantly Buddhist state. They have been confined into ghettos with bleak futures. Those rich enough to get out have placed their bets on a sea journey that invariably leads to death.

If they survive, where do they go? They are not welcome anywhere. The only glimmer of hope now is that the Philippines has just signalled a willingness to give safe haven to the refugees.

It is easy for me to lend a helping hand to the Nepalese by writing a cheque that hopefully translates into food and rebuilt shelter for the affected, but I cannot do much to help the Rohingya. I can only remember them in prayer and perhaps support groups that seek redress for them.                

What does it take for us to treat every person with fairness, and to respect their dignity even if we do not share the same beliefs, cultural backgrounds or language? Instead of feeling threatened, we should allow ourselves to be enriched by the differences. Diversity is what makes life interesting and helps us to grow into more multi-dimensional beings. And if we bothered to look a little deeper, we would realize we are not that different underneath. We all want and need the same things: love and acceptance.

So even though I may not be able to help the Rohingya directly, I can be more aware of others in my immediate sphere of influence and ensure I do not treat people who make me uncomfortable by brushing them aside and ignoring them. I can spend more time getting to know them. Befriend them, as Jesus befriended hated Zacchaeus or the scorned woman at the well.

I am no better, and no worse, than the next person regardless of age, sex, intelligence quotient, accomplishment, social or economic status. My value is equal to his or hers in that we are all children of God, made in His image and likeness. He is my brother. She is my sister. We are all related and we all live together in one abode called Earth. Let's not fight or exclude others but work towards a world without borders or poverty.  So lend a helping hand where needed for true wealth consists in the act of giving.

The Spirit of the Lord is on me, because he has anointed me to proclaim good news to the poor. He has sent me to proclaim freedom for the prisoners and recovery of sight for the blind, to set the oppressed free, Luke 4:18

Living a passion-driven life

When I attended a community meeting* last evening, I was not the only one who was completely knackered from a gruelling, hard-paced week and who had to force myself to turn up. God faithfully rewarded our grit.

Many thanks to Derek Chong who had himself just finished a full day of teaching, exhausted yet eager to lead us in a discussion about mission and passion. By the end of the evening, our passions were ignited, and we left for home feeling blessed, happy, complete, uplifted, united, excited and encouraged. 

In order to evangelize effectively as a community, we need to first identify our own individual passions so that when we come together on mission, we will intentionally tap on the different and unique passions of each person and present a powerful, transformational front: we will witness as one, cohesive whole - with Christ as our head - and empower those we meet to live in the fullness of life, and with great joy.

It is therefore also important that we know why we exist as community so as to know what we want to do and who we want to reach out to; we need to vocalize clearly and internalize a shared sense of mission.

As we shared our views with one another, it became apparent we came from different perspectives and desires and yet, these very differences displayed the beauty of community, a unity in diversity. In spite of our different views and temperaments, we ultimately shared a common goal that can be distilled in one phrase: to know Christ and make Him known.

Derek encouraged each of us to share our passions with one another, stressing the importance of living out our passions. He reminded us that whatever our pain and happiness were connected directly to our passions. Questions to ask include what pains me and makes me want to change the world? What excites and energizes me? What makes me come alive and brings meaning to my life? It is only when we connect to our personal passions that we can then work together as a team and become part of a successful outreach. There is still much for my community to digest and work through, but we are excited.

Being more intuitive, it was good for me to analyze my passions for I have since been able to articulate them more fully. This is valuable for I better understand what fulfils me, and I can now put more energy into living out my passions mindfully. It is pointless and draining to do otherwise.

It goes without saying that living a passion-driven life is not all high octane tripping and barrel loads of fun for it will encompass sacrifice, disappointment, hard work and perseverance.

It will require us to overcome our fears and insecurities, to put out into the deep against better judgement born of human intellect.

It can get chaotic, messy and require greater, and painful, surrender to God’s will.

It will expose our weaknesses and push us to take flying leaps of faith off cliffs of unimaginable heights.

It will be terrifying, stressful, demanding and arduous. At the same time, it will be exhilarating, enriching, fulfilling and life-changing.   

When we talk passion we usually mean something that we do in our free time, an avocation, or a distant dream. The prevailing sentiment is if we are unusually lucky, we get to enjoy what we do at work. I would like to propose that you reconsider if you do think of passion in those terms.

Passion should be an integral part of your life’s labour. You should be spending most of your waking hours pursuing your passions. Passions are dreams God has placed in your heart. They are shaped by your life experiences, constantly being refined as you evolve and grow. Do not let them wither and die out of sheer cluelessness or deadly procrastination. Discover them and nurture them so you can live each new day with great expectations and joyful verve, and accomplish great things along the way. 

Make passion a habitual way of living. 

* I belong to the Institute for World Evangelisation ICPE Mission Singapore as a Companion.

Getting rid of dead wood

When I was growing up, an aunt of mine would pronounce that because I was Cancerian, I was moody. At seven or eight, when an adult speaks, you presume it is the truth, so I was a moody, difficult and bad-tempered child instead of the shy, reserved and sensitive child I really was.   

The negative labels of my childhood still exist, much to my consternation. Moody, difficult, prickly - a personality only a mother would love (thank God she does). This is how I imagine others perceive me and therefore I proceed to behave accordingly, painting myself into a self-fulfilling prophetic corner when what I really want is to behave in the opposite manner. Inside I am moaning I am really not like this, I am actually quite funny, cheerful, and I can be considerate and flexible.

I know I will never completely outgrow my distortions and quirks, but I can try letting go of these negative labels for they are a poor reflection of who I am, so why let them control my behaviour?    

Last Sunday’s Gospel from John, chapter 15, encourages me to allow the Vinedresser to prune all the dead, fruitless branches of my being so that I can be more fruitful. I used to focus only on losing my faults and weaknesses but I now realize that these negative labels still emblazoned on my person need to be cut off as well.  

I like what Father Arro said in his homily. In order to be a growing branch of the true vine, I must live eagerly and the way to do it is to be in communion with others. This means interacting with people, putting myself into situations which may not be comfortable but will make a positive difference (especially for me when I challenge my distortions). To love people for who they are, even the ones who do not deserve it or who make me want to retreat is tough. But that’s what Jesus did. And He is the vine of which I am a branch.

Remain in me, as I also remain in you. This call to mindfulness is fundamental to growing in a wholesome and fruitful manner as disciple. If I keep my being centred on Christ, then my actions will be motivated by Him and I will not be handicapped by my less admirable inclinations or the childish need to be accepted. Pruning away the dead wood can be a painful and tedious process at times, but the results after speak for themselves.

I can talk and walk with integrity and others will feel loved and inspired by me. I can even be like the disciples of old, confident and bold in God's Spirit. I will grow in holiness and contribute much in building God’s kingdom of mercy and joy.

If you remain in me and my words remain in you, ask whatever you wish, and it will be done for you.

This is the promise that gives me the most hope for it tells me I can excise the negative labels of my childhood, plus, I get to do great things glorifying the Father’s name.

You can do it, too. Just remain in Him.