Entering into Holy Week

With Palm Sunday we have entered Holy Week, this most holy of seasons in our liturgical calendar. As I participated in the Passion narrative at mass today, this question to God popped into my head. Why do You love me so much?

This question first pinged my consciousness last Thursday as I reflected in front of the Holy Eucharist during the Penitential Service. I am so imperfect. I fall so easily, Every day I sin. I am so faithless in actions despite my repeated professions of love.

Today Father Joe (so nice to see you Father Joe, it's been a long while - missed your plain talking homilies.) talked about the cast of characters to be found in the Passion narrative and asked us which one do we identify with this Lent. Even if I discover I am Judas, he encouraged not to be afraid to acknowledge the truth for then I can work on doing something positive about it.

Funnily enough who caught my attention today is not one of the main protagonists but the man wearing only a linen cloth and who left the linen cloth in the guards' hands as he ran away naked. That is me, the one who runs away in fear, not caring if I have exposed myself to greater danger by being so vulnerable. On the other hand, being naked means I have nothing more to lose or hide. It's just me that comes before Jesus this week. A sincere gift of self with all my blemishes and rolls of gluttonous, slothful fat.

The whole point of Holy Week is sacrifice; not just the reminder of the Pascal sacrifice, but my final push to make this Lenten season one of personal growth and accomplishment. For all my failures throughout Lent to stay faithful to what I wanted to do, I can make the conscious effort this week to make it happen.

Father Joe pointed out Lee Kuan Yew sacrificed his life to give us a beautiful home in Singapore, we can surely sacrifice a little time and effort to make a difference and give back not just to God, but to the ones around us, using this holiest of weeks to effect the change.

It was a poignant send off for Mr Lee today. Even the skies wept as the cortege moved slowly from Parliament House to the funeral service in the University Cultural Centre. The true testament to our founding father's spirit would be if all Singaporeans decide to move forward boldly and cohesively as "one united people, regardless of race, language or religion".

I can begin by standing up to my own personal challenges and working on them, starting this Holy Week. At least then I can say to Jesus although I do not know why You love me so much, I can justify it by being more like You. 

Farewell Mr Lee

On Monday, March 23, at 3:18am, Mr Lee Kuan Yew, former prime minister of Singapore, passed away at age 91 after fighting pneumonia and a chest infection for over six weeks. I was greatly saddened by the news for I had hoped he would pull through in order to celebrate Singapore's 50th birthday come August. It would have been fitting for much of what we have accomplished is due largely to his painstaking efforts. As founding father, he gave his life in service for the success of Singapore. 

The more I read and listened to stories about how he worked so tirelessly and passionately to make this nation a better place for all who live here and how he put Singapore on the map, the more my respect and love for the man deepened.

While I personally did not agree with some of his past policies or how they were rammed down our throats without finesse, he is, without a doubt, a visionary, a great leader who parlayed the dismal fate of a tiny island with no resources into a shining example of political stability and economic development lauded by the world.

Reading Minister Heng Swee Keat's tribute Mr Lee's Red Box* shed light on Mr Lee's work ethic and passion. He lived and breathed Singapore and never stopped for a moment even when personal tragedy struck. He was truly a servant leader, putting national interest above personal comfort.

Being a romantic, what really touched me as a woman was his deep love, respect and devotion for his wife. Especially when it mattered, when she was in a locked-in, vegetative state, he would visit her faithfully every evening, spend time with her, reading to her the news or her favourite poems. Then there is his final request (honouring his late wife's wishes) to have his ashes mingled with hers so that they could be joined together in death as they were in life.

Naturally he has his detractors. He had to make unpalatable, hard line choices and he has made mistakes as hindsight as proven, but as he rightfully pointed out in his book Hard Truths:

I did what I thought was right, given the circumstances, given my knowledge at the time, given the pressures on me at the time. That’s finished, done. I move forward. You keep on harking back, it’s just wasting time.

I can certainly learn much from this, as I can from Mr Lee's insatiable curiosity, humility, integrity, guts, great listening skills, iron discipline and straight shooting style. We do not get to where we want to be without hard work, sacrifice, failure and perseverance. We do not become architects of change by playing in the shallows timidly, wearing blinkers or running for popularity contests.

Thank you Mr Lee Kuan Yew for devoting your entire life towards making Singapore this beautiful, safe, stable, culturally harmonious, somewhat egalitarian Garden City I call home. I may not always appreciate the heavy handed, oftentimes draconian, way of doing things, but I am profoundly grateful and proud to be Singaporean because you, Sir, have given me the opportunity to grow up and live in dignity, freedom and material comfort.

Thank you for running the good race. You were indeed the good and faithful servant (Matthew 25:23) leader. Requiescat in pace. You will be greatly missed.

* https://www.facebook.com/hengsweekeat/posts/870264306345429:0

24 hours for the Lord

Pope Francis invited all Catholics to participate in 24 hours for the Lord this 13 - 14 March as a mid-Lenten exercise where we avail ourselves of the Sacrament of Reconciliation as well as pray and spend time in Eucharistic Adoration.

There was a theme: "God Rich in Mercy" (Ephesians 2:4). If ever there is a time for mercy, it is today where people are unforgiving, mistrustful and mostly self-serving.

It does not help us that we live in a world where many worship the gods of self-reliance and material wealth turning even believers into greedy and narcissistic children.

Our prayers reflect an immature, demanding tone, and when we do not get what we want, we turn our backs on God in anger and bitterness. Our relationship with God never transcends the superficial and transactional.

Lord, I believe in you and trust you only if you answer my prayers as I call them. Do try and get it right. Don't go off on a tangent and give me something I clearly did not ask for. Were you even listening to me?

If I am a good person and keep all the commandments, God, you should be answering my prayers - spoken with the self-righteous petulance of the Prodigal Son's brother.

What does it mean for me that God is rich in mercy? It means that I am able to acknowledge and be grateful for His primacy and loving authority over my life every day. Father knows best and He never stops loving me and giving generously. All the time.

It means I treat Him with respect and love, all the time, instead of shunting Him to one side as I make my way through life, speaking to Him only when I hit a roadblock.

It also means that having received His grace, I need to reflect His mercy to others by reaching out to others with joy and doing good deeds enthusiastically, whether appreciated or deserved. That translates into not judging others or giving up on others. If Saint Monica can pray for her husband for 30 years and her son for 17 years before both experienced conversion then I must persevere. The world would have been more arid and dim if Saint Monica had given up on her errant son, Saint Augustine, one of humankind's great treasures.

Just Monday past I attended the funeral mass of my recently deceased neighbour, a diminutive, white-haired, old lady named Alice. She is my inspiration for she would toddle off for evening mass every day without fail. On the occasions when our paths crossed, she would smile and impart words of encouragement.

Always be humble she advised frequently, citing examples of how her pride would trip her up. Love God, which she did wholeheartedly through her lifestyle. Her children recounted how in the four remaining days of her life as she lay on a hospital bed she would clamour to make her way to evening mass whenever 5:30pm rolled around.

When one seeks God out so regularly and faithfully, one cannot but be transformed. She exuded the goodness of God in every pore. Aunty Alice will be missed not only by her family but all of us whose lives she graced with her sweet and cheerful presence, and her stalwart fidelity.

Although the 24 hours for the Lord is over, I will continue to seek opportunities to be with Jesus 24/7 and why not? My life belongs to Him and I should give thanks for every breath I take. As Muriel Donnelly concluded in The Second Best Exotic Marigold Hotel there's no present like the time.

Celebrating womanhood

My SD is fond of telling me that women were created to make the world a more beautiful place; only women, not men, can grace an occasion. Here is a man, a priest, who appreciates beauty as a truth created by God, and has a deep respect, and love, for women and men alike.

To all women reading this, I agree with my SD wholeheartedly and encourage all my sisters (brothers too) out there to respect their bodies as temples of God by looking after appearances without vain obsession, and looking after minds and spirits without becoming self-absorbed.

Women, do not let yourselves go. No matter how old you are, do not give in to gluttony and allow the pounds to pile on. Being overweight taxes your joints and organs, and leads to serious medical issues sooner rather than later.

Eat healthily and moderately so as to maintain optimum health (eat junk and you will soon feel like junk) and exercise regularly to ensure suppleness and grace when you move, it is pointless to put effort into looking good only to shuffle like a 90-year-old with shoulders hunched over, head forward.

Regular exercise has many benefits. You get your blood circulation going and you even release endorphins into your system so you feel good. It also helps you maintain muscle mass and keeps osteoporosis at bay.

Maintaining neuromuscular coordination helps upkeep your vestibular system and balance so you decrease the risk of falls. I could go on but I am sure you get the picture by now.

One last thing, you should not experience pain or stiffness when you move any body part (barring any serious accidents or health conditions). If you do, it is a sign to do something about it so that you come back to a pain-free state.

Experiencing pain in every step is not acceptable (as I write this I am not pain-free myself but I am working hard at getting there). Popping pills may be a quick fix but ruinous to your health - best to reduce any chemical reliance you might have.

So you work out, you watch your diet, and you look and feel reasonably decent. Great. Let's talk dressing. I am no expert and I admit to dressing down as much as I can to combat the tropical heat but I do try to go for casual chic rather than casual sloppy.

Modesty does not mean greasy, unkempt hair, baggy T-shirts or shapeless garments and flip flops. Look and smell good. Dress age appropriately. Aim to please the senses without causing a lustful reaction. Sexiness is a state of mind and not the state of undress which leaves nothing to the imagination.

Sisters, do not sell yourself short. Do not give in to the prevalent world view of how a woman should dress or behave if it means objectifying yourself or causing others to objectify you. Men you attract purely on the merits of your figure or easy virtue are not worth holding onto in the long run. Superficial and immature, there's not much to stop them from leaving you for a hotter and younger bod.

Demand to be loved for who you are and not what you are, how you look or how others want you to be. Walk and talk like a lady if you wish to be treated like a lady. Swearing or crude language is not becoming, even in a man. If you begin by respecting yourself in how you present yourself to the world, others will accord you a similar respect.

Let's not stop at looking one's best. We can further beautify the world through our behaviour, by speaking and acting with feminine grace.

As women, we are gifted with intuition, a softer and nurturing nature, and the ability to believe and hope in the goodness of others beyond logic or reason. We connect more easily than men with others, and we are more in touch with and articulate about our emotions. Rather than rejecting what is often perceived as weakness, we should celebrate our vulnerability and use it to empower others to be freer, and therefore better people.

Grow into your vocation as woman be it as daughter, sister, friend, colleague, wife, mother, grandmother or godmother. We can transform our environment when we exercise our feminine gifts with gentle integrity and quiet confidence. Our receptivity and creativity can give birth to life in more ways than just biologically. Use your talents to bring joy and comfort to others.

Be proud of your sexuality. Thank God for it and walk humbly, virtuously and with great dignity. If you are unsure of how you should act, let Mother Mary be your model. Mary was a woman who took everything to God in prayer and emerged with insights born of faith.

Be the woman God created you to be: beautiful, liberated and brimming with joy. Happy Women's Day.

Here I am

Last Sunday's first reading of the testing of Abraham inspires me to be a little more like Abraham, especially this Lenten season.

Here is a man who has remained steadfast and true to God his entire life despite major setbacks. First, he endured the curse of a childless marriage. Then, just when he should be taking things easy and enjoying life, he is asked to pack up and go to a new land on a ridiculous promise of abundance: descendants as countless as the stars in the sky or the grains of sand on the seashore. But he goes.

He is finally blessed with one son, Isaac. Okay, so God appears to be making good on His promise. Just as he luxuriates in the blessings of fatherhood God does a number on him. Offer his son as a sacrifice back to God. So what happened to the countless descendants if Isaac dies? Both he and Sarah are well into their 90s, is another miracle birth probable?

I like how Abraham responded. Here I am. How often do I say that to God?  To present myself fully in one heart, mind and body; to be attentive, open and obedient.

What great effort did it cost Abraham to follow God's instructions to the T, yet he did so seemingly without flinching. Here I am. Ready to slit Isaac's throat even as his own heart must've been breaking. As the reflection from Laudate pronounced:

Abraham is the father of faith because he put his hope in the promises of God. Faith makes us taste in advance the light of God's glory when we shall see him face to face.

Through the eyes of faith Abraham recognized God and God's call on his life. He saw from afar not only what God intended for him, but for his descendants as well - an everlasting covenant of friendship and peace with the living God.

Abraham could see beyond his impending grievous loss, to see past his own humans wants and needs out of his deep love for God. He was willing to die to self in the present to be able to see God face to face in the future.

Even though I share the same conviction of eternal life as Abraham does, and a similar deep love and reverence for God, I am not sure I can be as biddable as he was. And yet, I do desire to have a faith as unshakeable as his was.

What do I need to do to nurture such a vigorous and lively faith? It took Abraham a lifetime of regular, constant prayer, and a life engaged actively in good works to attain his high level of faith. Out of his habitual obedience he could hear God's whispers clearly and say in a heartbeat: Here I am. I am yours.

I hope to make this Lent a springboard to aligning my will to God's as much as Abraham's was. This requires me to stay awake spiritually so that I can be as attentive as Abraham  was. The reflection from Laudate put it across best:

How much do we miss of God's glory and action because we are asleep spiritually?  There are many things which can keep our minds asleep to the things of God: Mental lethargy and the "unexamined life" can keep us from thinking things through and facing our doubts and questions. The life of ease can also hinder us from considering the challenging or disturbing demands of Christ.  Prejudice can make us blind to something new the Lord may have for us. Even sorrow can be a block until we can see past it to the glory of God. 

I thank God for the robust and constant faith of Abraham, a true inspiration during this season of Lent. Here I am, Lord. I am yours.